#that's the bad future shit that really gets me. the family having moments of peace in spite of everything

[liketheletter-l]

it feels fitting that @somerandomdudelmao's most recent update inspired me to draw my First Successful Mikey Ever

srry i havent posted in a while i've been Really busy but hopefully will have more time to draw/write soon >:]

[dix0nvix3n]

A Peaceful Moment

-`✮´- Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Pregnant!Reader

-`✮´- Media: The Walking Dead

-`✮´- Warning: None really besides nondescriptive smut and describing reader getting horny lmao, other than that this fic is pure fluff. Oh, and mentions of cum, oops (During aftercare.)

-`✮´- Summary: Daryl catches you working on your baby's crib when you shouldn't be so he helps you finish it and you can't help but get turned on by him in the process and he helps you with that of course and you fall asleep in his arms after. You also see a glimpse into your future of your kid with Daryl.

-`✮´- Word Count: 2.1K

You're standing in front of a changing table, looking down at a miscellaneous selection of tools that you took from Daryl's toolbox in the garage and a larger than a newspaper-sized instruction manual on how to build a crib that currently was in multiple parts on the floor surrounding you. 

 

Your morning brain was having a hard time making sense of the instructions, but you needed to figure it out somehow. A few days ago you hit the eight-month mark in your pregnancy, and you were currently in fully crazed nesting mode. This crib was the last thing in the nursery that needed to be done before the room could finally be finished; you needed it to be perfect. 

 

Daryl had come home late from a run late last night, and you wanted to let him sleep in since he rarely ever does, so even though you needed help, you weren't going to wake him up and ask for it. 

 

All of a sudden you hear footsteps behind you and a "What are you doing?"

 

You turned around to face Daryl, who had a playfully stern demeanor on his face. You knew Daryl didn't want you working on the crib, but you did it anyway.

 

Daryl wouldn't let you lift a finger during your pregnancy, so scared that you may overwork yourself and harm the baby. Having waited so long to start your family together, it was a blessing to find out you were finally pregnant just two months after the war with The Saviors had ended and Daryl wasn't going to let anything happen to your baby. 

 

Every time you and Daryl worked on the nursery, you technically never worked. Daryl would have you sit down in the rocking chair in the corner and tell you, "You direct, I do." 

 

"Shit, sorry." You ran your hands through your hair and let out a stressed sigh, looking down at the parts that surround you. "I know you want me to relax, but the baby is almost here, and I can't relax knowing this nursery isn't done. This crib is the final thing that needs to be done to finish the nursery, and I can't relax until it's finished."

 

Daryl can instantly tell how stressed you are; he knew when you were focused on something you couldn't know peace until it was done, just like him many times. 

 

"Hey, look at me." He reaches a hand out and gently places it under your chin, turning your head so that you're looking him in the eye now. "I'm gonna finish this right now so you don't have to worry about a damn thing."

 

His close proximity made your cheeks heat up; every word or action this man bestowed upon you always made you feel entirely loved and cared for. "Really?" You looked up at him, smiling softly. 

 

Daryl notices the shift in hue in your face, so he gently brushes his thumb against the apple of your cheek, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. 

 

"Mmhm," he hums affirmitively, "you just sit over there lookin’ pretty for me, okay?" 

 

He steps a little closer to you, his hand now moving from your face to gently rest on the top of your bump, a protective and loving gesture. 

 

His actions sent a sudden and unexpected pulse of arousal straight down to your core. With the constant changing of your hormones through your pregnancy, it was hard to not get turned on by everything your husband did. It was basically impossible to not constantly be craving him. 

 

You placed your hand on top of his before your daydream was ruined by a swift kick against Daryl's hand. You were so down bad that even for just a moment you considered pushing all of the crib business to tomorrow. 

 

A small chuckle escapes Daryl's lips once he feels another kick, a feeling that he'd never get tired of. He gently rubs his thumb back and forth, crinkling the fabric of the old Motörhead shirt of his that he'd let you wear all the time. 

 

"Okay. I guess I'll just get to work folding some more of the clothes we got. Thank you, hon." You looked up at him with an appreciative smile. 

 

He leans down and presses a kiss to your forehead before he gently turns you around, ushering you towards the rocking chair in the corner of the room as he begins to look at the selection of tools you brought up.

 

Once you sat down, you grabbed the black garbage bag that sat on the floor beside the chair. It was filled with various clothing items found on runs or were gifted from other communities from families whose children didn't need them any more. 

 

Most of the clothes you and Daryl had for the baby were gender-neutral because you and Daryl had no idea what you were having. It was just your luck when you found out you were pregnant that you were never able to get any ultrasounds done because somehow both the machines in Alexandria and at Hilltop had stopped working and no one has been able to find a new one since. 

 

Daryl glances over at you every so often as he puts together the crib, his eyes shifting from the task at hand back to you. He watches as you fold a onesie, using your belly as a space to fold it.

 

Despite the fact you had no idea if you were having a boy or a girl, Daryl for a few months now has had an inkling it was going to be a girl. He had no concrete reasoning, just an almost always right intuition. 

 

"Y'know... I know we won't know until the baby's here, but I feel like we're gonna have a girl... just a feeling though." You hum fondly at the thought, placing a stack of clothes on the dresser beside you. 

 

Daryl grins at your statement and nods, "I was just thinkin' the same thing. Just a hunch." He said as he pieced together a whole section of the crib. 

 

You smiled back at him before you returned to your work, pulling out another pile of clothes and placing them on your lap. You grabbed a shirt from the pile that you flipped around so the front faced you, smoothing out the fabric against your belly to flatten it. 

 

Once you smoothed the shirt out, you realized that it was a size meant for a toddler before you read the words, "Birthday Girl," which had an image of a birthday cake under them. 

 

"Babe, look." You let out a little giggle as you held up the shirt to show Daryl. 

 

"Well, damn, that sure feels like a sign."

 

“If we have a girl, we'll keep it for when she fits it; if not, I'll give it to Aaron for Gracie to have.” 

 

After a bit more time, Daryl had finished the crib and stood up, pushing the crib against the wall as you folded the last item in the bag—a pastel green onesie with a pattern of rabbits leaping throughout—and placed it with the other stacked clothes up on the dresser. 

 

You stood up slowly, adjusting to the movement as you held a hand on your bump to help stabilize yourself, and walked over to beside Daryl at the crib. 

 

You looked at the crib and then at him, “It's perfect,” as you traced your hand along the smoothly painted white finish, “Thank you.” 

 

“It's no problem, hon.” He replied as he wrapped his arm around the small of your back. 

 

“Oh, wait! One more thing!” You ran out of the embrace of his arm and ran towards the dresser, pulling open one of the smaller drawers and pulling something out. 

 

“Can't forget this.” In your hands, you held up a Winnie the Pooh-themed mobile that hung little plushes of the characters, honeybees, and jars of honey, of course gifted by Rick when he got super excited to finally be an honorary uncle. 

 

You stood back beside Daryl and hooked the mobile onto the crib's extended attachment that could hang one over the crib. 

 

You watched Daryl touch it, gently spinning it around, imagining the view your baby would soon get to see. Your baby would soon be lulled to sleep as they look up at the spinning objects and beyond it to the many glow in the dark stars scattered along the ceiling that you had Daryl stick on. 

 

Once the mobile stopped turning, he looked at you as you beamed at him, deeply taking in the moment of this side of Daryl no one gets to see—something special just for you. 

 

He brought his hand to your face again, brushing his thumb against your cheek, causing you to gently shiver. 

 

You looked up and crinkled your nose sweetly at him, a soft smile graced upon your lips. “You better make love to me right now.” 

 

Daryl quickly grabbed your hand, walking fast towards the bedroom as you giggled in toe behind him. Once your bedroom door was shut, he instantly freed you of his shirt before gently helping you down onto the bed, littering kisses along your chest and onto your tummy. 

 

This far along into your pregnancy, side sex became a favorite position for you and Daryl. It was easy on your body so you'd feel comfortable and also not strain yourself, but it also always felt perfectly close and intimate as Daryl held you in a cocoon of loving warmth as he'd bring you to your peak, safely wrapped in his arms while he filled you with another warmth, softly muttering his praises into your ear and against your neck as his hips stuttered, eventually coming down from his own high. 

 

Once you were done, he'd pull out, making you mumble out a groan, missing the feeling of him being inside you as you tiredly blinked your eyes shut, exhausted from having woken up early. 

 

One moment you hear Daryl turn the sink on in the bathroom, and the next you hummed contently at the feeling of a cool washcloth wiping away yours and Daryl's combined fluids before your pair of sleep shorts were slid back up your legs. 

 

Daryl forced you to get up and go to the bathroom before you could go back to sleep. Once you got back from the bathroom, he already had shoved the massive pregnancy pillow he had found you under the blankets so it would circle the both of you in a loving hold—a nest of sorts. 

 

You tucked your back tight against his chest, and he placed a hand on your belly, and soon you were out like a light, both of you falling asleep into a nap that ran into the late afternoon. 

Here you are, two years later, as you and Daryl sit in your dining room, beside your two-year-old daughter, Willow, surrounded by the people you've come to know as family over the years, still missing Rick and imagining him there like you did on her first birthday. 

 

She had just gotten done blowing out her two candles, and Willow stared down at the chocolate cake, mesmerized by the specially made sweet treat for her birthday, amazed because it was rare to have desserts to this degree as it was much harder to come by the ingredients to make a dessert of its size, but your pride and joy deserved a cake on her birthday. On her first birthday, you were only able to make her a cinnamon muffin, the one-year-old didn’t know what cake was so she had nothing to compare the muffin to, she just knew she was enjoying sugar for the first time, blinking excitedly at her parents who watched her eyes light up as she ate a bite of a muffin you gave her.

 

It took a lot of reading, but you finally found a recipe book in Alexandria's library that had a recipe for chocolate cake that you could actually have all of the ingredients for. 

 

Willow picked up her spoon, shoveling up a big bite of her slice before holding the spoon out to you and saying, “Mama, try.” as she pressed the spoon against your lips. 

 

“No, baby. It's your birthday; you get the first bite. Mama will have her own slice.” You smiled at her and redirected her spoon back towards her. 

 

She looked down at her spoon and then at Daryl as he smiled at her, waiting for her to take a bite before she held the spoon up to his lips. 

 

“Try, daddy.” Daryl was about to oppose and tell her the same thing you did; before Willow giggled and shoved the bite past his lips and into his mouth. 

 

You and the entire room lit up with laughter as Daryl swallowed down the bite as a few crumbs fell onto the birthday girl's shirt, the same one you found her two years ago. 

 -`✮´- Extra Author's Note: This is my first ever finished oneshot, please be gentle! Also does anyone want to be tagged in an everything tag, I'm a slow poster so you won't be spammed or anything. I'm surprised I actually finished something for once cause I randomly started this last night even though I have many wips I can't finish. Sorry readers for my series if you're waiting for chapter 2, writing is hard 😭. Also! Dividers by cafekitsune!!! Follow them!!!

[ladystormcrow]

Fanfiction Author Interview Game

Thank you so much for the tag, @les-gnossiennes-fantomatiques, and I'm so sorry that it's taken me this long to answer it! I've been in a writing slump for the last few months (for both personal and external reasons), but I've started writing again recently (trying to get back into my old groove of at least 500 words a day), so I feel like I can answer this in good conscience.

How many works do you have on AO3?

Nine at the moment, plus four others on FFN that I still haven't transferred over.

What's your total AO3 word count?

208,006

Your top 5 stories by kudos/likes:

Katabasis

Trio Sonata

Mine

I'll Keep You

Imprints In Time

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do try to, though sometimes I fall behind or choke on what to say; I feel bad when I find myself struggling to respond to a long, thoughtful comment with anything better than "thank you, glad you enjoyed!". I realize it's never too late, though, so I'm hopeful I'll be able to catch up on responses in the future!

(The only time I've ever deliberately not responded to comments is when I was aware that the person who sent them was a piece of shit who I didn't want to engage with, but thankfully that's only happened once or twice. Very much a "your approval fills me with shame" moment for me.)

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

Probably Imprints In Time. It's a backstory fic for Madame Giry that ends with her estranged from her family and culture, recently widowed, and on the verge of being forced to retire from the ballet career she's worked so hard for, and thus deciding to help Erik make his start as the Opera Ghost (which we the audience know is going to end in more tragedy).

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

It's technically not finished yet (there's still an epilogue chapter to come), but I'd say Katabasis has a quite a happy ending: the dead have been sent to a peaceful rest, the exiled urSkeks have saved their planet and will be able to change their society for the better (and keep other urSkeks from harming Thra in the future), and Jen and Kira have gone from being the last of their kind to the adoptive parents of several dozen Gelfling children who will be a new beginning for their species.

Do you write crossovers?

I'm very much open to doing so, but so far I haven't, mostly because the fandoms I currently write for don't lend themselves well to combining universes. The closest I've come is the Les Miserables reference I included in Chapter 5 of Trio Sonata (or the SWAT Kats/Redwall fic I started but never finished when I was 15, but the less said about that, the better!)

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not really, no. The closest I've come is someone who complained they were disappointed that Agony and Ecstasy featured skekSa as the one topping during sex; I simply added a tag that made that clear and left it at that.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I didn't used to, but I've gotten more confident about both writing it and sharing it publically over the years (my experiences in the Tumblr RP scene helped a lot with that). The first fic I ever posted where sex was explicit rather than implied was Mine, which was a pretty standard wedding night consummation story (well, except for the part where one of the pair is an elderly hermaphroditic bird alien), but after that, I branched out quite a bit with Agony and Ecstasy (I'm pretty vanilla in my own sex life, so writing about characters having a BDSM session with cutting, bloodplay, and other kinks that I'm not personally into while still making it appealing to an audience was an interesting challenge).

Currently, Trio Sonata is my first experience of trying to weave sex into the plot of a longer story, rather than just a standalone smut fic, and I'm really trying to make sure that the smut is in character and serves to move the plot forward and develop the characters (not that I've got anything against smut for smut's sake, it's just not what I want to write for this story).

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Again, not that I'm aware of.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I haven't, though I've helped other writers with brainstorming and suggestions before (and they've helped me in return). I'm open to it, though.

What's your all-time favorite ship?

Oh man, don't make me choose! I'm pretty flexible when it comes to shipping as long as it's written well, so there are a lot that I like, even multiple ones with the same character. But if I have to narrow it down, I will say that I still love Megamind/Roxanne Ritchi after 14 years since the movie, and I also don't forsee my love for Erik/Christine/Raoul fading any time soon.

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

I started my own fanficverse for Megamind in 2011 with Life Is What Happens, and got partway through the sequel, The Storm and the Stars, before I stopped writing.

I always had meant to come back to that ficverse, but I now realize that's probably never going to happen, for two reasons. The first is that my own political and social views have changed enough since then that I'd have to completely rewrite parts of the story (for example, one of the main OCs is a former police officer, and I wasn't a believer in ACAB back then). The second is that the Megamind Rules TV series exists now, and both fills in the timeline when my fics took place and includes a number of the same key story elements, so I feel like there isn't really room for my fics in the fandom sandbox anymore (especially since most of my friends are fans of the TV show, and I really am happy that they enjoy it, even if it's not to my taste).

What are your writing strengths?

I like to think I'm pretty good at descriptions, especially giving a strong sense of characters and places in just a few lines, and coming up with interesting plots.

What are your writing weaknesses?

I'm not so good at character introspection, especially angst and romance. I worry about bogging down the flow of the story and falling into telling rather than showing, and that it won't be interesting or believable to the audience.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I think it can be effective if it's just one or two lines, especially if it helps convey character or setting, but it should be used sparingly and only if you're sure of the translation.

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?

I've toyed with the idea of writing an AU for Imprints In Time where Erik doesn't leave France after his fight with Antoinette, and they repair their friendship and eventually become a couple, which changes a lot of events that would otherwise have happened in canon (no Persia, for starters, unless it's under very different circumstances). I've also pondered an alternate OT3 involving Pharoga plus Madame Giry, but that's probably never going past pondering.

What's your favorite fic you've written?

At this point, it's a tie between Katabasis and Trio Sonata. I've mentioned it before, but they have a lot of the same basic story elements (hero and villain have to team up against an outside threat, which leads to them bonding and the villain becoming a better person), and since those are some of my favorite tropes, it's probably inevitable they'd be my favorite fics.

I shall tag: @cornistasiathecoblinking, @chaifootsteps, @locksnek, @musicalhell, and @flagbridge, plus anyone else who'd like to answer!

[goodnightmemes]

THE FALL OF THE HOUSE OF USHER SENTENCE STARTERS (part one / ep1-4)

❛ I'm sorry for your loss, ...your losses, rather. ❜

❛ Nobody gets away with anything. Not really. ❜

❛ Don't lecture me about family values. You're just as shit in that department as I am. ❜

❛ The gates are always open, but that doesn't mean you answer the phone. ❜

❛ That day was the last day we were all in the same place. Alive. ❜

❛ That is a brave and thoughtful thing to say. Especially if you want to get written out of the will. ❜

❛ I don't give a shit about the world. ❜

❛ The prenup's like a fucking phone book. ❜

❛ You let me move in, but you won't let me meet your family? ❜

❛ I'll freeze their fucking head and give it to my father on a platinum plate. ❜

❛ They will love you because I love you, and the only thing stronger than love is how scared they are of getting cut out of the will. ❜

❛ We really should get together more often, it's a balm for the soul. ❜

❛ And most people go their whole, wasted, stupid lives without one minute of true resolution. Not me though. ❜

❛ You know what a resolution is? It's a deal you make with the future. ❜

❛ The people in charge of making us healthy make us sick. We cheat the dying. We fleece the poor. Promote the racist. Let the demons run amok. This world needs changing. ❜

❛ If you could catch them all, take all of it, all the greed, the foulness, the rot in the world and sit down across from it, what would you say? ❜

❛ Was it ever going to be enough? ❜

❛ You're supposed to be shadowing me. Shadows don't fucking talk. ❜

❛ This is beneath you. And you're going to kill it. But you're better than all of this. And the minute you figure that out, you're going to be unstoppable. ❜

❛ We all, all of us, know pain. It's the great equalizer. ❜

❛ There's no such thing as a step back. You go forward. If you hit a brick wall, you don't go back, you go through. ❜

❛ Tell me, and don't lie. Is it everything you wanted it to be? ❜

❛ Nearly realized is the sweetest. It's better, I promise, in the moment just before than in the moment after. ❜

❛ Things like this, all things, in fact, have consequences. ❜

❛ You are consequence. And tonight, you are consequential. ❜

❛ I've always liked the bad boys. Got a weakness, I suppose. And you bad boys... you always just loved me. ❜

❛ You are a pretty, pretty little thing. ❜

❛ Say what you want, he was one of us. He didn't deserve to die like that. ❜

❛ You wonder why people hate us. This is why. ❜

❛ Everybody knows that edible arrangements are what you send to people you hate. ❜

❛ Did he mean it or is it just the edibles and the pot and the speed and the wine and the coke and the pills talking? ❜

❛ If you start thinking this is reality, you'll just slip into the abyss. ❜

❛ Dad decided that I belong in a room of smoke and mirrors, and I'm like a ceiling fan and I spin and I spin and I spin and I don't go anywhere. ❜

❛ Wow. I don't know who wouldn't want to be ringside for that, but no, I'm gonna let you grieve yourself into a coma by yourself. ❜

❛ We can talk about it after because I've had a shit day and I really just wanna starfish and forget the world. ❜

❛ Don't talk to me until I've come at least twice. ❜

❛ I love how deliciously, pointlessly mean you lot can be. ❜

❛ You still didn't need to come here though. It could have happened quiet. Peaceful. In bed. But I guess it's got to happen like this. ❜

❛ I'm sorry. It's not personal. It's just, well...Here we are. ❜

❛ It's amazing how far you can get on denial. You know why so many people use denial to get by? Because it really fucking works. ❜

❛ What? Don't like it? Cut me out the fucking will! ❜

❛ You can't enhance this image? You see it all the time on TV. They hit a button, it enhances it. ❜

❛ I don't even own anything funeral black. ❜

❛ Satin is silk for poor people, no one should wear it to a funeral, unless they died in it. ❜

❛ You know what? Fuck you if you think that, 'cause I would bleed for this family. ❜

❛ I will knock your goddamn lights out, you raise your voice at me. ❜

❛ Nobody knows they're the fall guy until they're falling. ❜

❛ Hey, I was hoping for some drugs. Sorry to be blunt about it, but that's it. I want some drugs. ❜

❛ Maybe you're right. Maybe I should take a break from the drugs. ❜

[fazfacts]

HOT DAGA SENTENCE STARTERS

it's actually criminal that nobody has done this before. feel free to change as needed!

❝ If you don't like it, you can kiss my buns. ❞

❝ Oh, he looks all pissed off 'cause his hat's still gone. ❞

❝ Good, I'm glad he's pissed. ❞

❝ I hope he crashes into that wall. ❞

❝ Oh shit, he crashed! ❞

❝ Wow! They look like a happy couple. ❞

❝ She's not happy with his driving, I'll tell you that. ❞

❝ Oh, he's on fire, he looks like he's hurting. ❞

❝ What a horrible occurrence that just happened! ❞

❝ What the fuck? ❞

❝ He's gonna come back like Michael Myers. ❞

❝ I can't really tell what it is, but it went by real quick. ❞

❝ Why did you run from me? ❞

❝ I...I didn't know how to tell you, but...we have a son now. ❞

❝ Wait -- I'm so confused... ❞

❝ Hello, [name]. I'm your father, [name]. ❞

❝ Why did you try to shoot me and leave me for dead? ❞

❝ That wasn't me. ❞

❝ It's me, [name], your evil twin sister. ❞

❝ I won't have you two together. You know I love [name]. ❞

❝ Now it's time to die. Mount your crab. ❞

❝ [Name], step aside! ❞

❝ Do you remember where we were? ❞

❝ Who are you? ❞

❝ Nice to meet you. I love you. ❞

❝ Promise you'll never shoot me, [name]. ❞

❝ Let's cover ourselves in mustard and get craaazy! ❞

❝ I hope you never get eaten on the Fourth of July like my parents. ❞

❝ Your words are making me happy, so I am smiling. ❞

❝ Always love each other, no matter where your paths take you. ❞

❝ We are siblings, but also best friends. ❞

❝ Why would we ever fight? ❞

❝ I have seen it in my special dreams. ❞

❝ Let's go eat the rest of Amelia Earheart for dinner. ❞

❝ My funding...my precious funding... ❞

❝ It's all over now. I suppose I'll let myself rot. ❞

❝ I'm in urgent need of your services. ❞

❝ What a shame...I was so close. ❞

❝ That's a good hashtag. ❞

❝ Like my dear old dad used to say, there's no free condiments in life. ❞

❝ Most condiments are free, actually. ❞

❝ How dare you! ❞

❝ Please, respect my father. May he rest in peace. ❞

❝ This talk of your father seems very shoehorned into this conversation. ❞

❝ I'm your son! From the future! ❞

❝ Hoooly shiiit. ❞

❝ Why did you do it, [name]? Why'd you do any of this? ❞

❝ Because, [name], I'm straight-up evil. ❞

❝ That's bad for the fabric of reality and space-time, I think. ❞

❝ Okay, it's technically not murder or anything. ❞

❝ This is what you get. This is the law of the wild. ❞

❝ I can't bear to watch this inevitable carnage. ❞

❝ I just want a picture of this moment. ❞

❝ I need your help to avenge my death. ❞

❝ We're a family again! A real family! ❞

❝ That's a terrible name. ❞

❝ I'm pretty sure this is a trap... ❞

❝ A crow ate one of my eyes at the bank last Labor Day, by the way. That's why I have an eyepatch now. ❞

❝ Did it ever occur to you, [name], that I loved you and your mustache? Well, I don't anymore, and I see you've shaved your mustache, you idiot. ❞

❝ The day we broke up was the best day of my life. ❞

❝ I saw him do a magic trick once where he sat on his own lap. ❞

❝ I'm suddenly afraid my wife will leave me for him, but he's a nice guy, so that's okay. ❞

❝ Wait a minute, you weren't invited! ❞

❝ It's me, [name], and I'd like to welcome you to Hell. Time to die! ❞

❝ I am displeased! But that does sound narratively rich. ❞

❝ Will you press pause on your shit for five minutes? ❞

❝ I now have to imagine a thing I don't want to imagine, under any circumstance? ❞

❝ Are you proud of yourself? ❞

❝ But I cannot attempt to process that at the moment, for the fear of the emotional toll it would take on me. ❞

❝ How'd we survive? ❞

❝ Ooh, what a plot! ❞

❝ We could go back in time to stop it all. ❞

❝ No need to explain that, we'll remember it always. ❞

❝ Thank you for your service. ❞

❝ Enough talky-time, more spacey-time, idiots. ❞

❝ We threw them into a volcano. They're gone. ❞

❝ I don't negotiate with assholes. ❞

❝ I can't believe it -- I'm alive! ❞

❝ Oh, no, no, hey, c'mon. Nothin' to worry about here. ❞

❝ That doesn't make any sense. ❞

❝ My parents were very juicy and I am, too. ❞

❝ You...don't seem trustworthy. ❞

❝ Oh, I'm plenty trustworthy. ❞

❝ So what's your deal again? ❞

❝ Hm. Makes sense if you actually track the story, probably. ❞

❝ I wonder if Earth's tasty. ❞

❝ I'm not one for decision-making. ❞

❝ I'm both the mayor and the sheriff. ❞

❝ Don't worry, you will soon go to jail. ❞

❝ I want to get perfectly sane, haha. ❞

❝ You're getting more and more sane by the day! ❞

❝ Everyone's dying and the world is basically over. ❞

❝ Sometimes your life don't go exactly as you planned. ❞

❝ The fact that I doubted myself for even a split second is some military-grade bullshit. ❞

❝ It's me, [name], and I'm pissed. ❞

❝ I can't die, I'm beloved! ❞

❝ Question: what the hell's going on? ❞

❝ If you do anything dumb, I will kill you with my hat. ❞

❝ You didn't need to do that, by the way. That's cruel. You understand that? ❞

❝ I didn't ask to exist. In fact, I was very content not being. ❞

❝ Look, I'm sorry about doing you dirty. ❞

❝ We've got some things to discuss, you and me. ❞

❝ Ohhh, okay. We're both dead, then. This is for sure a place where we're both dead. ❞

❝ My last memory was me putting a goldfish in my mouth to make my children laugh. Then I choked to death. ❞

❝ Play shitty games, win shitty prizes, [name]. ❞

❝ I was so consumed with hate and anger that I lost sight of who I was. ❞

❝ Are you just, like, checked out of this conversation now? ❞

❝ I'm just a guy in a void. ❞

❝ I got murked and it chilled me out. ❞

❝ That's my catchphrase, now that I'm fun. ❞

❝ Tell you what, I hate this planet. ❞

❝ There's a small part of my funky, no-good heart that's like, "hell yeah." ❞

❝ Hey, you want some money? It's got my face on it. ❞

❝ The one thing I've always said is, "you can definitely trust someone who repeatedly insists that you can trust them," you idiot. ❞

❝ I'm the queen of deception and straight-up dirty tricks. ❞

❝ Game recognize game, however inferior. ❞

❝ I've just had a tremendously confusing dream. ❞

❝ I'm not in the habit of taking drinks from strangers. ❞

❝ But I'm beloved... ❞

❝ I. Don't. Caaare. ❞

❝ It's almost Friday, the day for kissing! ❞

❝ If you value your life, you might consider staying out of mine. ❞

❝ Is there any way we can put this all behind us? ❞

❝ Are you fucking kidding me? You shouldn't have asked that question. ❞

❝ Oh, thank God. I was about to flip my shit. ❞

❝ Full disclosure, no offense: you seem nuts. ❞

❝ My mind is so clever, some describe me as a God. ❞

❝ My name is [name], and I'm here to say: you'll soon straight-up die today. ❞

❝ I'm perfectly sane, so now it's time to play my funny little game. ❞

❝ Where'd you go to college? Detective school? ❞

❝ I'm gonna save your life for my own benefit. ❞

❝ I have no beef with you. You're clearly dealing with some stuff. ❞

❝ Don't worry, I will murder you. ❞

❝ I feel like you're not being receptive to literally any of my shit. ❞

❝ I was hypnotized for many, many years and frankly, I'm not too happy about it. ❞

❝ Well, you can't blame me for that. I'm dead. ❞

❝ I think you could maybe choose not to be complicit in the destruction of the universe. ❞

❝ Jesus Christ, take a breath. ❞

❝ If you don't stop this instant, I'm gonna hug you. ❞

❝ I feel like a happy sunshine person who always wins. ❞

❝ I feel as critically-acclaimed as I always do! ❞

❝ You should know by now, nothing exciting ever happens around here. ❞

❝ Hey, you ever think about what happens after we die? ❞

❝ Sorry for my dad being a dick all the time...and for following his orders without question. ❞

❝ I hate you and I'm glad you look all fucked-up! ❞

❝ Namaste or whatever. ❞

❝ I just wanna chill 'til I'm dead. ❞

❝ Whoa, okay. I think I'm gonna die. ❞

❝ Those were the bad guys! Why were you, like, chilling with them? ❞

❝ Man, you really pooped the bed on this one. ❞

❝ Okay, your tone is appropriate and I apologize. ❞

❝ I will miss you, [name], the biggest baller of them all. ❞

❝ I'd actually be double-dead, which is the worst kind of dead. ❞

❝ What can one do in the face of such monumental loss but breathe a weary sigh, for the world is a little quieter now. ❞

❝ Sometimes your death don't go exactly how you planned. ❞

❝ I tried the best I can, but I ain't got the stuff. ❞

❝ Frankly, life's been pretty dope. ❞

❝ I know life's been crazy, but believe me, you'll be fine without me here. ❞

❝ There's really no need to cry. ❞

❝ I know things seem kind of shitty and that the odds aren't looking pretty, but what's the point of quitting now? ❞

❝ I won't be here to see it, but you bet your ass that I believe that you'll still save the day somehow. ❞

❝ If I had a fuckin' bucket, then I got a hunch I'd kick it. ❞

❝ Sorry for the cursing, but I'm feeling worse and worse. ❞

❝ I don't wanna die, but I'm probably gonna die. ❞

❝ I'm dying now, just so we're clear. ❞

❝ Holy shit, this is it, I'm gonna die. ❞

❝ I'll see you later, pals, I'm outta here. ❞

[m-jelly]

All I need - The end

@ladycheesington <3

Levi x fem!reader

Future Fic, Romance, Drama & Romance, Falling In Love, mafia, Gangsters, Love, True Love, Fluff, Protective Levi, Possessive Levi, suggestive moment, mentions of violence, mentions of bad childhood, mentions of bad mother.

In this chapter: You and Levi take your last public stand against Ariana and work to destroy her for good. With everything set, you become bait for a crazy Ariana. You and Ariana face off, Vincent has closure and you finally get peace. It's wedding day and it is full of love from everyone.

Today you were on a mission to piss off Ariana even more than you had before. An invite had come your way to speak on a talk show. Before Levi, you would have dreamed of doing something like this, but here you were all dressed up to talk to the host. It felt all so surreal to you that you had so much confidence now in yourself and your body. Having a man who loved you more than anything saying you were incredible and perfect helped.

Levi reached over and untangled your earring for you. “You look like a Queen.”

“Thank you.”

He wrapped his arms around you. “Marry me.”

You hummed a laugh. “I will be.”

He tilted his head and spoke against your lips. “I mean now.”

You giggled. “We can’t, my grumpy love.”

He pouted. “Why not?”

“Because you made plans for the wedding. We even taste-tested a cake.”

He lowered his head. “You’re right.”

“Let’s just go out there, do our interview and then go home.”

He hugged you and hummed. “Okay.”

You rubbed his back. “This will all be over soon, okay?”

“I know. We have to get Ariana to lose her shit, attack and then we can take her out.”

You pulled back a bit and kissed him. “Yes, my grumpy love.”

“Sorry to interrupt.” The host shyly walked closer. “I’m Lucy, I will be interviewing you both today. Can I say, I am so excited to meet you both.”

You shook her hand. “Nice to meet you too. Levi has asked you to call me Mrs Ackerman and I approve. We’re not married yet, but we will be in a month.”

Levi yanked you closed. “She’s my wife already in spirit.”

You giggled. “You cutie.”

Lucy laughed. “Well, Mr and Mrs Ackerman, please follow me and if you want anything to drink let me know!” She walked with you. “I love the dress you are wearing and your makeup is so good.”

You smiled at her. “Thank you. It’s a new line of clothing and the makes is special too.”

“Oh, could I ask you that on the show?”

“Of course, I would love to tell you all about it.”

Levi squeezed your bum. “You’re wonderful for finding these two companies. I just know talking about them will help them out so much.”

Lucy sat in her chair. “Oh, are they small businesses?”

You took your seat and waited for Levi to sit next to you. “Yeah, they’re small and they are incredible. The owners are so sweet too.”

Lucy clapped her hands. “Amazing. I can’t wait to find out because I would love to use the makeup and have the clothes.”

“You like it that much?” Your cheeks burned as you smiled. “I’m glad. That makes me happy.”

Levi kissed your cheek. “You are adorable.”

Lucy grinned. “All right, you both ready?”

“Yes.”

She shifted in her seat and smiled at the camera. Lucy gave her introduction and talked about who she had and what was going on for the show. She mentioned current events and how things were being impacted and changed. Even the topic of your and Levi’s attack was news as well. Talks of it being Ariana was out and people were turning against her, it didn’t help that she said she’d kill you at a charity event.

Lucy turned to you. “Welcome Mr and Mrs Ackerman, thank you for coming.”

You smiled. “Thank you for having us. We normally don’t do this, but so many rumours are flying around and we need to talk.”

“Oh, understandable really. I have a few questions for you and I’m sure there are some you are expecting.”

Levi sighed. “We are. We want to answer everything we can and please understand that there are some things we won’t be able to.”

“That makes sense, you as a family are taking care of things.”

“That’s right.”

She shuffled a bit on her seat. “The attempt on your lives. Word is you know who did it.”

You turned on your seat and showed off your spine. “This is what I had to have done. The bullet that went through Levi went through me.” You sat back in your spot. “Levi has one too.” You reached over to him and touched the side of his neck. “He was also shot in the neck.”

Levi turned his head and kissed your hand. “It was a horrible day.”

You held Levi’s hand. “It happened on the day we were celebrating our engagement.”

Lucy welled up a little and clasped her hands together in front of her mouth. “Oh, you poor things. A day that was supposed to be celebrated became such a scary day. They say De’lore was behind it.”

Levi pulled you close to him. “That’s right. The sniper confessed he was hired by her.”

“I bet that is terrifying, especially when she threatened you at a charity event. We have a clip of that. Are you okay for us to show it?”

You nodded. “Yes.” You looked ahead and saw the clip playing. It was odd looking back on how she was and your reaction to it. At the time you were being tough, but seeing how she spoke to you was awful. “I can’t believe it.”

Levi hugged you. “You were amazing in that moment, so brave too. It’s a shock to see it back.”

Lucy placed her hand on her chest. “I can’t believe how she spoke to you. It really makes it clear that she wants you gone and the shooting had to be her.” She turned to the camera. “All of you out there watching this live, I know you saw this coming. We’ve had people trying to whistleblow about her and her businesses. If you’ve been mistreated by this woman and her business, please speak up. I know it’s hard to avoid her name on things, but I’m sure there are ways around it.”

You smiled. “There is. All the stuff I’m wearing and my makeup has nothing to do with her.”

Levi rubbed your back. “Her dress is from an amazing company. You find out what body shape you are and shop in that category.”

“That’s right.” You grinned. “So, they have a category for apple, hourglass, pear and all sorts. If they don’t have your shape, you measure yourself and send it in and they create a whole new line so people like you can get clothes too. You’ll get your first outfit at a big discount. It’s incredible.”

Lucy reached over. “May I touch the fabric?”

You lifted part of your dress for her. “Of course!”

“That’s so soft.”

You smiled. “The ladies who make these clothes are dedicated to women feeling comfortable in their own skin. Women come in all shapes and sizes, so do men and it’s hard to find the right fit and they help you. There is fair trade and equal wages too in their company.”

She clapped her hands. “That’s wonderful. They sound so perfect.”

Levi played with your hair. “Her makeup is cute.” He leaned closer and kissed your neck. “Though she is super cute first thing in the morning with no makeup on, messy bed hair and my shirt.”

You giggled as he nibbled your neck. “Thank you, my grumpy.” You smiled at Lucy. “The makeup I use is made by a married couple, both ladies are so friendly. It is nice for your skin, has organic materials in it, isn’t full of bad chemicals and you get this cute wand with it. So, you put the makeup on and use the wand and it keeps it on your skin. The wand activates it and it won’t rub off your skin. When you’re ready to take it off, you just turn the wand off and the makeup comes off so easily. You won’t need to use multiple wipes.”

Lucy inspected your skin. “It’s so flawless too. Is it on thick?”

“Nope. You don’t have to put it on thick and it doesn’t even feel like you’re wearing anything, unlike De’lore.”

“Incredible!”

You gave the names of the companies and showed their social media pages, along with their websites so people could buy things. You cuddled up to Levi and started talking about your romance and how you met each other. You giggled as Levi got all flustered when you talked about how charming he was and how he chased you around.

Levi released a long sigh. “I was lovesick right away. Even though she thinks she wasn’t pretty when we first met, I thought she was so cute. I wanted to know everything about her and make her mine.”

“He spoiled me so much. He made up a job for me and created a cute desk.”

Levi blushed. “The job wasn’t made up.”

You giggled. “I know it was.”

He whined a bit. “Fine, fine, it was, but I wanted to keep you safe and make sure you knew how valuable you were. When I met you, you thought you were worth less than nothing.”

You welled up a little. “Levi.”

“You are my bunny goddess and you are worth so much.” He kissed you and hummed. “My precious bunny. If anyone dares to take you I will-.”

You covered Levi’s mouth with your hand. “Grumpy, we are live.”

Levi took your hand and showered it with kisses. “I’ll be a good boy.”

You giggled. “Thank you.”

Lucy fanned herself. “My goodness, the fire between you is incredible. You are two parts of a big soul, together you form one perfect person.” She leaned closer. “I gotta ask, you two having kids?”

Levi yanked you onto his lap. “Yes. We’ll make the sweetest and most perfect babies ever.”

You laughed. “That’s what we want, yes.”

Lucy squealed. “They will be so cute!”

You smiled a little as Levi fixed your summer dress a bit. “Levi.”

He whined a bit. “I’m not sure about this.”

“It’s the only way.” You cupped his face. “Ariana has been ruined. I’ve taken everything from her, she has nothing now and I know she’ll want me dead. I have to become bait.”

He hugged you tightly. “But what if she hurts you.”

“She won’t. Your gang is in place ready to protect me and you will be watching. Trust me, Levi.”

He tapped his forehead against yours and released a sigh. “I love you.”

You tilted your head and kissed him. “I love you forever and always.” You released Levi. “Once we do this, then it’ll all be over.” You sighed again. “She’ll be gone.” You turned on your heels and walked outside the building. “Let’s do this.”

Levi watched you from inside the building. He reached up and pressed the earpiece in his ear. “The bunny has been released. Remember, follow at a distance. We have to make the snake think the bunny is alone.”

Sasha replied. “I’ve got my eagle eyes on her. Looks like everything is clear so far.”

Mike spoke. “Scouting ahead, can’t see anything yet either.”

Levi climbed the building, left the top parking area and climbed into his car with Erwin in the passenger. “I’m worried.”

Erwin looked over at his friend. “She’s a tough cookie. She can do this.”

He whined a bit as he started driving. “I just don’t want her to get hurt. She got beat up because of me and a debt. She had to get a new spine because of me.”

“She’s stronger and smarter than you think.” Erwin smiled. “She’s become a stronger woman. You’ve allowed her to grow.”

“I guess you’re right.”

“I see a snake!” Sasha’s voice came through the earpiece. “She’s coming in hot and fast from the east. I think she might ram the bunny.”

Mike answered. “I’ve lost eyes on the bunny. She went through a building tunnel.”

Levi started to panic. “Bunny! I’ll race ahead. We have to find her car.” He drove ahead as his heart raced in his chest. “Come on bunny!” He drove his hover car around the building and saw Ariana’s car T-bone a parked car. “No…”

Ariana was driving fast and her rage was consuming her. All she could think about was killing you. You had ruined everything for her and after your live show, people were abandoning her left and right. All the money she had worked hard to build was now gone. She had never been this poor before. The only thing she wanted was for you to die.

She had followed you for a while and saw your car float into the building tunnel. She moved around the building and waited on the other side. As soon as you were out and parked in a nice spot, she floored and crashed the side of the car. Excitement surged through her because she knew that you had to be dead or dying. She stumbled out of her car and started laughing when blood dripped out the bottom of the door.

She opened her purse and pulled out her gold and pearl handgun. “I really hope you’re alive because I want to look you in the eyes when I shoot you in the head.” She walked closer in her designer high heels. “I don’t care what Danny says about you, you’re poison.” She glanced behind her to see a car pulling up making her smile. “More people who support me here to see you die.”

She fought with the door a little, it was heavy and stuck. A frustrated scream escaped her as she yanked on the door, but it wouldn’t open. She kicked the door a few times before yanking it open. A wicked laugh escaped her when she realised that the door was now open. She pulled it wide and saw there was nobody inside. All that remained inside the car were blood bags.

She glared. “What in the fuck!?”

“Amazing, right?”

She turned to see you in a stunning summer dress with a cute hat, your hair done nicely, pretty small heels and delicate makeup. At your side sat Hades with a cute bow. Ariana shook. “You should be dead…”

You folded your arms and popped your hip to the side. “Mm, no. Not yet. I have a long life to live.”

Ariana gripped her gun in her hand and Hades noticed. As soon as her hand twitched to move, he ran right for her and jumped. She lifted her hand with the gun but Hades was faster. He bit her wrist and ragged it causing her to drop the gun and scream in pain. She dropped to the floor before Hades released her. He bit her gun and ran over to you.

You took her gun and smiled. “Good boy.” You took the ammo out and sighed. “Did you think killing me would be so easy?” You walked closer to her. “I planned all of this out. I made sure that you wouldn’t and couldn’t win.” You leaned down and smiled at her. “You’ve lost to the woman who is fucking the son of your enemy. Isn’t that funny?”

Ariana screamed at you. “I hate you!”

“And I hate you. We have something in common.” You stood up and looked at cars turning up. “Oh, here comes the cavalry.”

Levi sprinted over to you. “Bunny!” He scooped you up into his arms and held you tightly. “Oh, my little bunny I thought that was your car and not the fake.”

You giggled. “I’m safe.” You showered his face with kisses. “You are the best.”

He put you down. “I guess I did use my brain in this one, huh?”

“You did.” You looked over to a car landing to see Vincent get out. “Your brother is here.”

Levi held you close as he watched his brother. “Let him process.”

Vincent stormed over to Ariana on the floor. He pulled his gun out and pointed at her face. With gritted teeth, he fought the tears stinging his eyes, but the emotions running through him were almost too much. “You…you…” He shook. “You were supposed to be my mother! I was nothing but this…tool to you…did…did you ever love me?”

Ariana panted as she held her arm. She stared up at Vincent. “What the fuck are you doing? You want to face off with me and try and get me to say I always loved you? You want me to say I regret being a bad mother?” She laughed. “You want me to fix your broken heart, huh? If you want me to be honest, Vincent, I wish I never gave birth to you. You’re a disappointment. I guess beating you was fun though. I destroyed my body for nothing.”

Vincent lowered his head and sobbed a little. “You…” He flinched when he heard a crack and Ariana scream. He looked up to see you pulling your fist back. He softly said your name. “Why?”

Levi pulled Vincent back. “Because we’re family.”

You shook your hand. “Your face is hard from all those surgeries, fuck me.” You hugged your arm to your chest. “Kuchel? You wanna hit in?”

Kuchel ran over and hit Ariana hard. “Vincent is my baby! Mine! I love that boy! He’s my son!”

Sebastian picked up Kuchel as she thrashed about. “Darling kitten, put the claws away.”

Vincent turned and hugged Levi. “Thank you.”

Levi rubbed Vincent’s back. “You don’t need her, okay? Now, where’s my confident and cocky big brother?”

“I’m here, you short handsome man.”

Levi shoved his brother off. “I’m not short.”

You hugged Levi tightly. “He’s perfect size. He’s my big man.”

Levi squeezed you. “Thank you.”

“So, what now? What are we going to do with her?”

Levi picked you up. “Don’t worry about that.”

You pouted. “But Levi.”

“Remember I told you that I would tell you about my mafia life, but some things will remain a secret to protect your cute head?”

You nodded. “Yes.”

He carried you to his car. “This is one of those times.”

“Okay, I’ll be a good girl.”

He sat you inside the car. “Good, thank you.” You looked around him. “Is Vincent going to be okay? Vincent! Do you want to stay over ours?”

Vincent laughed. “Thank you, but I’ll stay with mum and dad.”

“Okay! You can come over anytime though!”

“Thank you!”

You sat back. “He’s nice. Oh, someone wants you to call them a good boy.”

He looked down at Hades as he sat with his tail wagging. “There’s my boy. You protected your mummy so well!” He fussed Hades. “Good boy!” He chuckled. “I’m going to get you a wonderful reward.”

“He deserves a massive bone.”

“He does.” Levi let Hades into the car. “Look after mummy a bit, I need to talk to everyone for a bit.”

You waved. “Be good.”

“Can’t promise that, bunny.”

You giggled. “I can’t wait to get you home.”

Levi paused a moment as he registered what you said. He smirked a bit. “Dirty bunny. I’ll punish you later.”

You sat back in the car and let out a long sigh. “I love that man so much.”

Hades lay his head on your lap wanting a fuss, so you gave it to him. It all seemed so peaceful now and safe. Your eyes closed as the tension in your body went. You didn’t realise how much you’d been clenched up, or how much anxiety was deep in you. Facing off against Ariana was a scary thing for you, there could have been so many things that could have gone wrong, but they didn’t.

You started laughing as tears ran down your cheeks. You rubbed your tears away as you kept laughing. A part of you couldn’t believe you were alive and well, that you had survived all of this. It made you feel so free now that this madness was over. The next steps for you now were marriage and kids.

You perked up when Levi got into the car. “Hey, grumpy.”

Levi gazed at you. “Are you okay? You’ve been crying.”

“I just…it was that crying where you laugh. I’m just relieved.”

Levi held you close. “I understand. I do.” He kissed the top of your head. “Let’s get home, eat some food, watch some TV and have amazing sex.”

You laughed. “Sounds perfect.”

Your mother fixed your hair for you and smiled. “You look like a princess.”

You welled up as a mix of emotions went through you. “Thank you.”

“I can’t believe you’re getting married. It seems like only yesterday you were a baby in my arms.”

You hummed a laugh. “Time flies, huh?”

“Levi is the perfect man. I won’t question his job.”

You giggled as you walked with her. “Best not to, mum.” You walked over to your maid of honour, you knew there was no one better for the job. “Vincent, do you have my flowers?”

“I do.” He smirked and handed you the flowers. “You know, I still can’t believe you asked me to do this. It’s the best thing ever.”

You hummed a laugh. “I couldn’t think of anyone more perfect. Also, my party was amazing.”

“You’re welcome.” He put his arm around you. “You ready?”

“I sure am.”

He stopped you. “Are you sure? I mean, we could run away together now.”

You laughed. “Vincent.”

He winked at you. “Got you to laugh. Sorry, you looked like you were nervous as shit.”

“Thank you, I feel better now.”

“Good.” He put his arm around you. “Now, let’s take you to go make the biggest mistake of your life.”

Your mother laughed. “Vincent!”

You backhanded his chest. “Vincent.”

He laughed. “I’m kidding! Levi is the best. I love my little brother.” He stopped in front of your dad. “She’s all yours.”

Your father offered his arm. “Come on, pet.”

You linked your arm with your father’s and walked towards the carpet laid out. A wedding in a garden was a dream come true and had you and Levi all over it. The peace and quiet were everything you needed. All the decorations were delicate and sweet. Levi had thought about everything when he set up this place. You were happy and deeply in love with Levi.

As soon as you locked eyes with Levi you started smiling and couldn’t stop smiling. Levi’s eyes widened when he saw you. A deep blush spread on his cheeks as his heart skipped a beat. He smiled so lovingly at you and walked towards you. Levi ignored the laughs and whispers as he ran towards you. He wrapped his arms around you and held you close to him.

Your father chuckled. “Now that is a man in love. She is all yours.”

Levi pulled back a bit. “Sorry, I squished your flowers.”

You giggled. “It’s okay.”

Levi smiled at your father. “Thank you.” He moved you towards the front. “You are so beautiful.”

“Thank you. You look so handsome. Your suit is perfect.”

“Yeah? I’m glad.” He hugged you close with one arm. “I can’t believe we’re getting married.”

You giggled. “It’s a dream.” You looked in front to see Sebastian. “Your dad is marrying us?”

Levi nodded. “He insisted.”

You hummed a laugh and hugged Levi’s arm as Sebastian read a few things and then allowed you and Levi to say your vows, of course, Levi moved you with his words of love and devotion to you. Your heart was filled with love and joy. He always made you feel like you were the single most beautiful person in the world.

Levi held your hands and said your name. “I would never die for you. I would never give my life up for you. Dying is too easy. Living is hard, it’s the hardest thing in the world for some. I want to live for you. Every single moment of my life will be dedicated to you and being with you. I eat, sleep, work, breathe and live for you. All the things I do in my life either involve you or it is for you. The way I view the future is different now. There are so many things I look forward to. Since you, I worry more, I fear more, I’m anxious more, but I smile more, I laugh more, I sing more, I do more and I enjoy every single moment. I explore my emotions and let them all out. I know that I can do anything in this life because I have you right by my side. Sometimes I worry that saying I love you is not enough to help you understand just how much I do love you, but sometimes those three words are all I need. I love you.”

You welled up a little and sniffed. “Incredible as always, Levi. You just have a way with words.” You wiped your tears away. “Damn, um I don’t know if I can come close to your vows. You’re so beautiful.”

He cupped your face and kissed your forehead. “I want to hear.”

You nibbled your lip. “For a long time, I was never happy. I didn't know what happiness was. I longed for happiness that I saw others having, but as time went on it seemed like it was not meant for me. I didn’t know what my purpose or what life had in store for me.” You gulped hard. “I let so many people walk all over me and I thought that was it, that was my life. You just appeared in my life like this black knight. You made me see that I am beautiful, smart, funny and kind. I gained a purpose in life and every single day with you was bright and full of colour. I have come to love myself and grow so brightly. Now I am excited for what life brings next. I’m excited for new things. I’m excited to go out there into the world. Every day I spend with you is pure deep happiness. I never knew happiness was this incredible. My happiness is you, all of you. I love you Levi more than anything. I will keep telling you every day I love you just so you know just how much and how deeply my love for you is.”

He smiled at you. “Adorable.”

You lowered your voice to a whisper. “I felt like that sucked compared to you.”

“You were incredible.” He exchanged the rings with you. “You are always incredible.”

Sebastian smiled. “You both may kiss.”

Levi yanked you against him and crashed his lips against yours. “Mine.”

You giggled. “Yours.”

“You ready for dinner?”

You nodded. “I’m starved.”

He scooped you up in his arms and started walking with you. “Mine.”

You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him. “I love you.”

“I love you forever and always.” He carried you to a little area just for you and him. He sat you down as your friends and family took their seats at other tables. “A nice little private spot for you and me.”

You shuffled closer and kissed him. “Yes.”

“I’m so glad everything is good again.” He sighed. “We have a nice perfect wedding.”

You hummed a laugh. “You disappointed that nothing went crazy?”

He smirked. “Well, a few explosions and gunfire might make it more exciting.” He leaned over and kissed you. “Though a lot of the exciting stuff will happen tonight in our room.”

You purred. “It will.” You massaged Levi’s Levi as you watched your guests. “Do you know what I find weird?”

He hummed at you. “Tell me.”

“That people are taking pictures and trying to film us.”

Levi nuzzled the crook of your neck. “That happens when you’re an Ackerman.” He kissed you and sighed. “So, how long before we can have a baby?”

You giggled at how sweet he was. “We can give it three years.”

“One.”

“Two.”

He hummed in thought. “Okay, two.” He hugged you tightly. “I know you getting the spine was a bad day, but it is a good things because it’ll keep you strong.”

You smiled at Levi. “Yes.” You kissed Levi and sighed. “How about one session of baby making tonight, hmm? My wedding present to you.”

Levi perked up. “Yes please.”

[jade-kyo]

Red vs. Blue seasons 15-17 retcon pros and cons:

Season 17

I actually like s17 a fair bit so perhaps the pros and cons of the retcon will be a bit more balanced than they were with 16!

Pros:

Alright we know the drill. No time travel bullshit.

Honestly the biggest fault of this season is being a continuation of s16. The character writing is good but even the best writing can’t fix a bad story.

I’ll be honest I’m struggling to find pros to the retcon that isn’t just restating stuff I said about s16 but yeah god like beings under guise of being AI just ain’t the vibe

No Genkins. He’s just not a very good villain to me.

Don’t care for the whole thing with Huggins parents

Again Tucker has to redo his character development. The scene with Felix is good but was completely unnecessary if s16 hadn’t fucked up Tucker so badly

I feel like Genkins and Krovos are the weak points of this season

Seriously if they were actually treated like AI and not gods this would be way better

Time travel bullshit

I know it’s actually Genkins but seeing Church impaled by a gulf club was disturbing

red team labyrinth visions could have been so much better.

Simmons vision being just another bad penis joke

Lopez Vision. I get he’s a robot and comes back but come on. Just seems in bad taste to me.

Not necessarily a pro of the retcon but still a gripe I have with the season but I think it’s a crime we didn’t get to see Caboose’s vision like come on you already waisted Simmons on comedic relief you could’ve at least given us Caboose’s

Also wish we would’ve seen more of Tucker’s vision

None of that “and the found family goes their separate ways” nonsense. I don’t care how mean they were to Donut I do not vibe with that shit.

Tho again the implications of this being Church’s simulation- Church did always like Donut best. Maybe he was trying to give the man some justice. That’s actually a really sweet thought.

Cons:

Donut. Just Donut.

Donut realizing all the unintentional dirty jokes he makes

Just Donut

Genkins telling Locus that Felix is afraid of knives and Locus just going with it

Dr. Grey

WASH AND DONUT. THAT IS ALL.

Just how much Carolina cares about Wash and that it’s Donut that helps Wash realize it!

SEEING THE FREELANCERS AGAIN

Wash being able to relate to Donut because he remembers what it was like with the freelancers

WASH SCREAMING IN HIS HELMET

Caboose understanding time travel. My bois so smart

Carolinas apology

Caboose beating the Genkins out of Church

DONUT CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT

PINK!!!!!

Wash and Carolina

Doc said fuck

Kai’s vision and Grif

Carolinas vision because HOLY SHIT IS THAT WHOLE SCENE SO GOOD

The emotional gut punch that is Wash

Wash’s disability

Verdict:

Okay straight up I actually really like this season. To the point that I was actually struggling to find any pros to the retcon. Honestly the biggest flaw is just that it’s dealing with s16 shitty story. If you took this character writing and applied it to a good story I would absolutely love this. So I guess you could say that in theory I’m sad to see it go? Like I’ll miss the character moments it gave us but not the overall story.

But yeah that’s my personal list of the pros and cons to this retcon. If that’s even what’s actually happening. After all these simulations are all potential futures right? So who knows they may not be completely retconned. Only time will tell at this point, we’ll know for sure once the season comes out.

Either way I’m just glad to see this series end at last and hopefully it will end in a way that we can be at peace with.

[mellowdiplomattrashpsychic]

The tags mentioned assumed sa with Dan actually meaning that Vlad was once a part of him, he made him, and he hates that. But I'm going to add in that he also sort of likes it because I headcanon Vlad having an obsession about family and Dan likes feeling protective of his kids. This, of course, gets misinterpreted.

And then I make it worst by having Ellie refer to her wanting to be the perfect daughter but saying it like Vlad was grooming her. So uh, this is your warning.

-----

Wally was texting Dick that if Wally didn't respond in the next hour, he'd call back up. Then, he heard the muffled sobs.

He froze for a moment outside Dan's door. Was it a good idea to knock? Probably, probably not. He could lockpick it or even just go through the door. His current clothes weren't made for that type of thing, but that didn't really matter right now.

Then he thought about why he could hear him so well.

He looked to the side, and just as he expected, a window was open.

He moved to stand beside it and started to really listen.

"-can't just not think about it, Jazz! I can't even- I hear him. I could hear him in my head, and I hate it. I hate it I hate it I hate it!"

Heavy, wet gasps of air fill the silence as the other person, Jazz, responds to that.

"No! No, I don't like- I never wanted that to happen, I-I wanted some form of reassurance! I wanted everything to be okay even if it was never going to be, so I asked him for help. I asked him, begged him and- and he had that voice, that voice, Jazz. That stupid fucking voice that somehow makes me shiver in fear but also relax."

Wally heard him let out a manic laugh. The words that Dan was saying were connecting dots. Dots he didn't even know existed. Dots he didn't want to exist.

"But he was nice..."

And Wally wanted to scream that no! No, he wasn't! Whoever that man was, he took advantage of you, Dan!

"I don't... I hate him. I hate his voice, but I love them. I love them like he did me. He went- it was a bad idea but I... I asked for it. That was my fault that I ended up this way. This was all my fault and I don't know if I hate that I'd do it all over again! I'd change a few thing, I would, but I'd go to him. I'd still go to him..."

Oh shit-

Dan was in love with his rapist. He blamed himself for getting raped. For having gone through that twice, possibly more times.

Wally's hand covered his mouth and his eyes teared up.

Fuck, he hated when he heard things like that. As a hero, he doesn't have to really go into it to help. The family and friends of the victim would seek it for them in his stead.

But this was Roy's friend. A friend that was becoming a friend to the Flashfam. They couldn't let him think this way. They could let him think he should go back to that bastard.

"Dad...?"

"Ellie! You're- you're supposed to be asleep."

"You're crying. Is- is it him again?"

"... It's nothing bad."

"He's always bad, though."

"He loved me, he loved you and-"

"But he hurt you."

"I asked him to."

"I thought I wanted it too."

Wally's eyes went wide.

"What?"

Dan didn't know. That gave Wally the slightest peace of mind, but he still felt sick to the stomach.

"Not- not like you. But I wanted him to like me. So I played dress up and did what he told me too. He didn't do anything like he did to you, but he still hurt me. Is it ok if I asked for it too? That I wanted it?"

Wally heard the chair scrape the floor and fall over. With a small peek, he saw Dan hugging Ellie tightly.

"No. No, it's not ok. It's never ok."

Wally decided to leave. He got more than enough intel to know what was going on with Dan.

No, he didn't know what happened to his family that made him evil in the future.

But he knew that he was sexually abused and that his daughter was too. He doesn't think that Ellie had lost her virginity. He really hopes he's right.

All that was enough for him to decide that they have to help Dan. No like he was before. Yes, they'll support him as a single dad, but they'll also help him get away from that monster. Ellie might’ve already got him to, but there's no guarantee that he wouldn't make a deal with the bastard if pushed to a corner.

Wally won't let him get to that point. And if Dan did get backed into a corner, then he'll make it so that Dan turns to Roy or any of the Flashes, even the Bats or Supers or- or whoever! He won't let him go back to that hellhole!

Wally stomped off, texting Dick that he was fine and went to the Flashfam group chat.

Dcxdp

Dan/Danny/Dani 2/5

Dan raising Ellie and Danny in Central City

Due to the GIW interfering and almost killing everyone, Danielle was destabilized and Danny was almost completely ended.

Dan, who had been doing community service with Clockwork, was now saddled with his younger self who was now a baby, and his younger self’s clone, who was now a toddler, both of whom had very little memories of before.

Due to Vlad and the GIW, being dicks, it wasn’t safe for Danny or Ellie to remain in Amity while the fighting was going on. So, clockwork decided that Dan, for the rest of his parole, was going to raise both halfas in the immortal world, since staying in the infinite realms was not good for them.

Thankfully, clockwork and Tucker created a fake identity. He was now Dante times, a single father of a girl named Eleanor and a boy named Danny. Clock work even lined up a job for him as a mechanic at a shop in Central city.

He even had a slightly odd friendship with a guy named Roy, a single dad who lived in Central City due to some problems with his father, and had an adorable little girl named Lian.(Ellie and Lian were best friends from the moment they met, and both girls doted on baby Danny.)

Wally hadn’t expected much when he found out Roy was living in Central city. It was a well-known fact that he had been feuding with Green Arrow for a while, and the Flash Family had agreed to let Roy hide out here. What he wasn’t expecting to see was the guy who Bart had warned them all about, the guy that had taken out all the heroes, including Batman, in his nightmare future, talking to Roy over coffee while a girl who looked exactly like him play dolls with Lian. He especially wasn’t expecting to see the man Bart described as a sadistic monster soothe a crying baby boy who looked almost exactly like him.

Wally got the feeling they would have to have a Flash Family meeting soon, and started debating on bringing Roy.

[plantley]

future bf standards

would happily chop firewood for me. like if i’m just bored and wanna play with fire, or am cold, or want s’mores

southern and outdoorsy

preferably gone to therapy or would be willing to

good relationship with mom

will go camping with me

will take me dancing

notices the little things. can pick up on small signs of when i’m getting to a bad place or when i’m in a good place

actually gets me flowers, or just pick me some

isn’t an alcoholic

tattooed

able and willing to work through problems and not just call it quits

sense of stability and has some idea of a plan or ambition

wants a simple happy life, not hustle obsessed. just wants to build a sanctuary together

wants animals, maybe would be down to have a plot of land with like chickens and stuff

supportive of my art

be able to imagine a future together. i’m tired and would really like the next guy i date to ideal be like the real deal

is able to understand/been through dark shit and be able to have real talks about it but also be able to joke about it

wouldn’t leave me if my cancer comes back or i get sick again. statistically, it’s super common as a woman to be cheated on or left if you get ill. but also i need to be able to trust that i’m not a burden and they feel forced to stay with me out of pity

doesn’t make me feel like a burden

doesn’t mentally, emotionally, or physically abuse me

is good at back and forth communication. will not just shut down and block me out

gets along with my family and wants me to be involved with his

takes me out on proper planned dates, not only just hanging out and watching tv or having dinner

interdependence but not codependent. like we can lean on each other and make each other better but are still independent and individual people who can function without each other

not clingy/possessive, but makes be feel like theirs. makes me know i’m theirs and they’re mine

interested in each others hobbies and wants to be involved

is able to talk about their feelings and emotions openly

let’s me know if there is a problem or something we need to to talk about. doesn’t just bottle it up until it explodes

doesn’t make me feel bad for feeling things strongly or make me feel like i need to tone myself down and make myself smaller

makes me feel confident in my skin and not feel compared to other girls

makes me truly feel loved

will get excited about things with me. like if i’m really excited about an upcoming meteor shower or something lame, they’ll be excited with me, even if it’s not particularly something they care about but they care because i care

will go to concerts and see bands with me

is sentimental and remembers small moments that mean a lot

wants to put in the effort and so cute mushy things. like wants to do picnic dates or paint nights and cheesy things

uses nicknames and terms of endearment. i’ve never had a bf call me love, sweetheart, babe, honey. sweetie, dear, etc and i think it’s so precious

wants to show me off and is proud of me

isn’t a cheater

loyal. in a romantic relationship but also just in life. loyal to friends and people they love and keep their word when they say something

not long distance

can deal with my adhd, so like will go on walks with me and follow my stream of thoughts and bounce back and forth with me

wants to travel and do road trips and adventures

down for spontaneous plans, like pulling off at a flea market or new hiking trail on a whim as we pass it

makes me feel safe and i can tell them what i’m genuinely feeling. i have a hard time opening up and truly letting myself be venerable, because being venerable leaves you open to being hurt

someone i feel secure in the relationship with. that i don’t have to second guess how they feel about me or worry that they’re going to leave me or that i’m not enough for them

comfortable with the day to day mundane things together. like able to doing separate things in the same room and feel at peace being together. like one of us cooking in the kitchen and the other doing something on the computer, and us being happy in the same space

will come to art events with me and clean up nicely

precious forms of intimacy, like kisses on the cheek and forehead, twirling me around, holding my hand or thigh, etc

is able to apologize when needed

works together against the problem, not against each other

doesn’t yell or raise their voice in anger

able to joke and tease each other

active/likes to workout. being big strong man who can throw me around would be nice

[the-dawn-star]

Hi! I have a request if you don't mind.

Can you write a five hargreeves x reader where it's an enemies to lovers slowburn and when five comes back to the present time he sees reader and is annoyed, and the reader is also annoyed. Reader has bf and five gets extremely jealous and realizes he has feelings for reader...something like this? (you can also change the plot if you want). I'm on s1 of tua and I'd like a fic on that season. No worries if you don't wanna write though.

Thanks!

A/N: I knew this took a long time and I changed the plot a bit, but I hope it's okay.

-S

+not proof read, 800ish words

Jumping from time to time was exhausting and no matter how much coffee I drank, nothing seemed to help. The future was terrifying and apocalypse coming to us was not exactly a vacation, and after all the time alone it had become my job to fix this mess.  

My siblings were more interested at their own thing to bother on the END OF THE WORLD so I had to do it all by myself. Well, almost by myself... 

Pogo had hired a kid to clean the house once in a while, who also ended up seeing the plan that I had been building for saving the world.  

The kid, who told their name being Y/N was annoying and seemingly was quite close with my siblings. It wasn’t the fact that they were normal human and interested at the Apocalypse more than my siblings, no that all was just fine to me. They were annoying because they had a bad habit of caring about stuff that they could not change.  

And they should have been with their family and friends spending the last days with them, but no... They decided that the best thing was to follow me around trying to do whatever they could to stop the unchangeable.  

They looked like a lost puppy and they even weren’t cute.  

--- 

Five walked on the front doors of the academy confused by the silence of the house. All of his memories from this house was full of noise, that wasn’t most of the time because of happiness. Had anyone ever been happy in this house?  

He jumped through the space, as easily as taking a step and ended up in the second-floor balcony.  

“Holy shit!?!!”  

A second later Five was holding a knife on his hand and holding it to the academy’s new cleaner throat. Their eyes met and the cleaner could do nothing else than to see some of the bloodthirsty gaze in the eyes of the boy in front of them.  

“You really can’t stay out of the way...,” Five whispered, letting the knife fall down. He could see how scared they were and for a moment he wanted to apologize and say that it was his fault. 

“I’m sorry, I was just waiting my boyfriend,” Their words sounded painful.  

Five got up, turning his back to the cleaner just so they didn’t need to see the pain that flashed on his face with the word ‘boyfriend’. It was ridiculous, after all that he had done their house cleaner’s boyfriend that sparked such an emotion that he wasn’t sure that he could name.  

“I’ll get out...,” They whispered, pushing themselves off of the armchair and practically ran down the stairs to the first floor. But they didn’t get that far.  

Instead, their hand was taken by Five and the next second they were half way down the floor only being pulled back up by the time traveler. Their chest collided painfully to each other.  

Once again, their eyes met but this time there wasn’t a murderous glare in Five’s eyes. His eyes were hard and full of something that could have been seen as care or kindness.  

 Five had traveled time and space, but for once it was like time had completely stopped. It was one time when there wasn’t a need to move in his life. Just looking at their house cleaner's eyes and letting the seconds pass. It was such a peace that he had never felt before, complete and udder peace. 

But like all it had to break. But this time it was done by a boy who walked in the academy. Both of them turned around to see who invited themselves in.  

“James...!” The cleaner yelped surprised, pulling themselves off of Five’s hold and ran to the arms of the walk-in.   “Are you okay?!” The boy asked not turning his eyes to his partner, instead staring at Five.  

“Yeah...,” They whispered pulling themselves off of their boyfriend. 

Five could do nothing else than to stare, still in the peace that he had felt only seconds before, silence and peace that was ripped aways just like his life was when he got stuck to the future.  

“See you, Five...,” The cleaner whispered while their loving boyfriend was pulling them out of the door, like Five had been killing his partner.  

The door shut with a bang and five was left in the silence again. Silence that was nothing like the silence he had felt while looking at the cleaner’s eyes. Five jumped back to the second floor right in front of the knife that he had dropped without a second thought when they were going to fall.  

He picked the knife up jumping to the kitchen where he left it.

[crankynewt]

Good for a Weekend (Helmut Zemo)

Masterlist

Summary: You were retired, a disgraced Avenger content living the rest of their life out in solitude. But Sam and Bucky's shenanigans dragged you back into the hero life and you found yourself face to face with the man who'd got you into this mess in the first place. The question is, however, is he really who you thought he was? Or are you just as crazy as him?

Pairing: Helmut Zemo x Reader

Warnings: TFAWS Episode 3 Spoilers, Zemo (he's a warning), swearing, mentions of torture and experimenting (past), drinking, Zemo being semi-protective, I think that's it??

Word Count: 3.41k

Author's Note: Biting the bullet and writing this BEFORE Marvel does something to get us to hate him again. Also, ZEMO AND BLANK SPACE WORK SO WELL TOGETHER OMG.

“You’ve got to be shitting me.” You murmured, looking at the message from Sam flashing across your phone. Although you had stopped dead in your tracks, the chaos of the bustling streets of London continued around you. You pushed your sunglasses further up your nose, them having fallen down as you were peering at the screen of your burner cell.

‘Need your help in Madripoor ASAP,’ the text read. You weren’t daft, you knew exactly what kind of lawless entropy happened on that Indonesian island and if Sam was asking for your help, that meant he was in some deep shit.

‘I’m retired,’ you replied, glancing over your shoulder out of habit. Although you’d been pardoned after the Berlin incident by the government, you were still a disgraced Avenger in the eyes of the world. All you wanted was to live the rest of your life out in peace, a future without the world-saving you began when you left HYDRA with the Maximoff twins.

You hadn’t chosen to become a human lab rat, tortured and exposed to the mind stone until you could suddenly hear the thoughts of others in your head. Telepathy and telekinesis were not necessarily the kind of special skills that employers wanted to see on a resume, but alas, here you were. Thankfully, however, you'd learned to block them out until necessary to violate people's privacy. Fighting aliens and other superpowered entities, including the people you’d once considered to be your family, were in the past.

‘Please. It’s Bucky,’ Sam messaged again. Those three words were enough to make your blood run cold and your heart stop. Bucky was the reason you were in this mess in the first place, and you would be damned if the ex-assassin was going to fall back into the clutches of evil.

With a sigh, you typed back ‘fine’ and began the trek towards your apartment. Your phone was vibrating again immediately, Sam explaining that they would be picking you up at a small airstrip on the edge of the city.

Three hours later, you were walking along a long, concrete runway, the harsh England wind attacking your body as you pulled your leather jacket tighter around you. Your brows furrowed in confusion at the sight of a civilian jet rather than the military-esque vessels you’d become accustomed to. The steps were awaiting your ascent with an older man stood adjacent to the entrance.

“Ms.(Y/L/N),” he greeted. A thick accent laced his tone, one you couldn’t quite determine from the crackling of age in his voice. German or Russian, most likely, you deduced. Attempting to be polite despite your skepticism, you gave him a tight-lipped smile and handshake before the elder man gestured towards the stairs for you. Entering the jet, you turned right to be met with the familiar faces of Sam and Bucky.

“(Y/N)!” Bucky exclaimed, rising from his seat and embracing you in a hug. He held you tightly against his body, almost as if he wasn’t sure you were really there. The super soldier had taken a liking to you when the two of you stayed in Wakanda during your exile, both of you having a certain understanding of the other due to your shared experiences with HYDRA. The sergeant had become somewhat of a brother to you in your time away together. “What are you doing here?”

“Sam messaged me.” You replied, Barnes��� arms immediately releasing you as he whipped around to face Sam.

“You tattled on me to (Y/N)?” He scoffed. If looks could kill, Sam would have dropped dead from the darkness in Bucky’s orbs.

“Wait, if he’s okay then what am I here for?” You said, shifting your gaze to Sam as you raised a brow.

“You’re here to make sure that he stays in line.” Sam snapped, crossing his arms over his chest as Bucky let out an exasperated ‘Jesus Christ’ under his breath.

“Bucky’s fine, Sam.” You replied, rubbing your face with your hand in annoyance as you glanced at the super-soldier.

“He’s not talking about James.” A new voice sounded from behind you, one both vaguely familiar but also strange. Whipping around, you were met with a face you’d only ever seen through a screen. Zemo.

“What the fuck is he doing out of prison?!” You exclaimed, looking between Sam and Bucky in utter disbelief.

“Bucky broke him out of jail!” Sam exclaimed, pointing a finger towards the super-soldier.

“Sam’s the one who pulled me into this mess!” Bucky pointed back.

“You two morons have reached a whole new level of dumbassery!” You exclaimed, keeping a cautious gaze on Zemo in the corner of your eye. “You broke out the man who ripped apart the Avengers out of jail and you let him do it?! The same man who killed King T’Chaka! Do neither of you remember what T’Challa and the people of Wakanda just did for us after we became enemies of the state?! I cannot believe that you would betray their trust and help this monster to escape!”

You paused for a moment, breathing heavily as you looked at the ashamed faces of Bucky and Sam in front of you.

“I’m sorry to-” You heard Zemo begin, you turned to face him with utter rage shining in your eyes. “No! The grown-ups are talking, you can wait your turn.” You scolded him, almost as you would a child but just a tad harsher. Grown-ups may have also not have been the best choice of words to describe Wilson and Barnes.

“I don’t want any part of this suicide mission!” You snapped at the duo, moving to leave.

Thirty minutes later, however, you were still on the jet, glaring into a pair of brown eyes as the four of you flew through the air. Honestly, you couldn’t believe you were still there, but Sam and Bucky knew you too well and pushed just the right buttons to convince you to stay. Sam needed you to tap into Zemo’s mind if need be to figure out if he was planning on betraying them, and you didn’t want two of the last people you trust getting themselves killed if you could prevent it.

Tweedle-dee and Tweedle-dum were sitting across from each other, meaning that you got stuck sitting across from the Baron in silence. He shifted uncomfortably under your gaze, the darkness in your (Y/E/C) orbs not sitting well with the man.

“So, you read minds.” He began, rubbing his hands together anxiously. You noted the nervous tick and couldn’t help but feel amused at his discomfort, but your expression never faltered.

“You don’t need to make small talk.” You bit, your icy tone growing colder in every syllable.

“I’m genuinely curious, is all.” He began, pausing his fiddling to brush his hair back only to resume it once more. “It just seems like for someone with your abilities, you’re often an overlooked member of the team. You’re the most powerful, even more so than Maximoff or Banner, perhaps, yet you were never truly an Avenger, were you?”

“It doesn’t matter, I’m retired.” You muttered, ending your glaring to gaze out the window. The way Zemo spoke about you was unsettling, especially considering how he felt about the Avengers. He seemed not to think that you were part of the team, similarly to Bucky, and that brought you a feeling of unease.

“And why is that?” Zemo pushed, your avoidance evidence that he’d struck a chord.

“Why do you care?” You scoffed, looking back at the Sokovian man, both annoyance and exhaustion present in your tone.

“Because I think you’re like me.” He answered, his tone becoming quieter. Zemo didn’t look at you with the same rage you’d seen in footage from 2016, nor with the amusement that he gazed at Bucky and Sam with. No, it was something different, softer and analytical, perhaps. You wanted to peer into his mind for something, anything to figure out what he was thinking, but he would likely feel your prodding into his consciousness. As of now, he didn’t seem to have any plans to betray you guys, and you wouldn’t be the one to give him a reason.

“That’s enough from you.” Bucky interrupted, rising from his seat to switch places with you, his brotherly possessiveness clear as day.

The rest of the flight was uneventful, and Zemo provided the three of you with costumes for the roles you were to play in Madripoor. Yours seemed to have been designed specifically to be horribly uncomfortable, both in feel and the amount of skin that was exposed in the cool evening air. The three of you were making your way towards the glowing city shining in the distance, the nerves in your stomach rising with each step.

“Only an American would assume a fashion-forward Black man looks like a pimp.” Zemo explained in response to Sam’s protests over his own outfit. “You look exactly like the man you’re supposed to be playing. The sophisticated, charming African rake named Conrad Mack, aka the Smiling Tiger.”

“He even has a bad nickname.” Sam said, looking at the picture of Conrad on the phone Zemo had just handed him. “Hell, he does look like me though.”

“And who am I supposed to be playing, exactly?” You questioned, still unsure as to what role you would be playing in this scheme.

“My partner,” Zemo said simply, an amused smile working his way onto his lips.

“What?! No! Nu-uh, I’m not doing that!” You protested, Sam chuckling at your denial of what was probably inevitable.

“Would you rather the alternative of all of us getting slaughtered the second we step foot into the city?” Zemo retorted, still humored by your resistance.

“Fine, but if you try anything I’m going to break your nose.” You gave in.

"I wouldn't expect anything less."

Soon, the four of you were making your way into a bar, Helmut’s arm wrapped tightly around your waist since the second you exited the car in a mock possessiveness. It was all part of the charade, you had to remind yourself, as the Baron kept your side pressed against his snugly.

Making your way up to the counter, the bartender didn’t look impressed to see the group of you there as he made his way over to you.

“Hello,” He began. “Wasn’t expecting you, Smiling Tiger.”

“His plans changed. We have a business to do, with Selby.” Zemo interjected before Sam could respond.

“The usual?” The bartender ignored Zemo and turned his attention back to Sam, who simply gave a curt nod in response. The bartender turned, grabbing a snake from a jar and slicing it down the underside with a blade. A part of you wanted to cackle, especially seeing Sam stiffen beside you, and you didn’t doubt that Bucky was having to restrain himself as well. Zemo didn’t seem surprised as the bartender pulled who knows what out from the snake and placed it into a glass.

“Smiling Tiger, your favorite.” The Baron commented, the bartender sliding Sam his beverage only to pour two glasses of a different liquor for Zemo and yourself.

“I love these,” Sam said, raising to clink glasses with yourself and the Sokovian man whose arm was still draped around you.

“Cheers, Conrad,” Zemo replied, smiling back at poor Sam. The three of you downed your burning liquor, Sam struggling the most out of the three of you, clearly appalled by the organ at the bottom of his shot. You could see Bucky give a little nod in the corner of your eye, knowing he must be finding this as amusing as you were.

A man soon approached Helmut from behind, tapping him on the shoulder before he turned to face the stranger, shifting you with him. When Zemo felt the little nudge, he immediately pulled you closer to him. You were even tighter against him now, so much so that you had to wrap an arm around him as well to stabilize yourself. It was almost as if he was trying to shield you from the man despite him knowing full well that you can hold your own.

“I got word from on high; you ain’t welcome here.” He spat, getting too close to the two of you for either of your likings. But Zemo kept his air of indifference while you instinctually moved closer into his side. It’s all an act, remember? You have to play the part of the clingy partner who would get frightened at such a rough man threatening you two. Or at least, that’s what you told yourself.

“I have no business with the Power Broker, but if he insists, he can either come and talk to me…” Zemo began, trailing off as he gestured to Bucky.

“New haircut?” The strange man asked Bucky, who merely glowered in response.

“Or bring Selby for a chat.” Zemo finished, this time him being the one to get into the man’s face. Thankfully that was enough to send him away, most likely to Selby or this Power Broker who seems to be Madripoor’s own version of Big Brother.

You could feel Zemo let out a breath that you don’t think he even knew he was holding, giving a quick glance down at you before placing a peck on your temple. For the facade, of course. But what wasn’t fake were the butterflies rise in your stomach, something that you hadn’t felt in a long time. Were you… Flustered?

No, you reminded yourself internally. This was a very bad man holding you close, the same one who killed the former King of Wakanda and ripped your team to shreds. Not only that, but he hated all the Avengers, so why did he seem to like you? It doesn’t matter whether or not he likes you, he’s Zemo. But the more time you spent with him, the more intoxicated you became. He was starting to look more and more like your next mistake, and love is certainly not a game you wanted to be playing with him. Right?

The next thirty or so minutes were a blur. Bucky having to fake being the Winter Soldier to kick a bunch of men’s asses to finally meeting up with Selby, only for Sam to break your cover through a phone call and Selby quickly being shot. The four of you promptly exited the bar, attempting to remain inconspicuous until bounty hunters from all around started shooting at you. Bucky and Sam jumped forward, meanwhile, Zemo darted to the right, dragging you with him as he moved his hand from your waist to interlock your fingers.

You cut through alleyway after alleyway, hiding in the shadows as gunfire echoed around you. Eventually, you managed to catch up with Bucky and Sam, approaching the pair with your hand still in his.

“Well this is too perfect.” A female voice interrupted your mini-reunion, Sharon Carter emerging from the shadows as she ripped down her hood, gun fixated on Zemo.

“Drop it Zemo,” She started, Zemo raising his gun-holding hand before lowering the weapon to the ground. “You cost me everything.”

“Sharon, wait.” You reasoned, raising your hand as you slowly backed up.

“What, are you his lover now? His sugar baby or some shit?” She badgered you, causing your eyes to widen as you only just remembered that you were still holding his hand. You quickly dropped it, raising it to match your other arm as Zemo sent you a look that you couldn’t decipher. Oh, how desperately you wanted to look into his mind, but the little bit of sanity left in you told you to leave it be.

“Someone recreated the super-soldier serum and Zemo had a lead,” Sam explained.

“That explains why you guys are here. And Selby’s dead.” Sharon replied, gun still pointed at your group.

“So what are you doing here?” Bucky questioned the blonde.

“I stole Steve’s shield, remember? I also took the wings for your ass so that you could save his ass from his ass and became a criminal with their ass.” She explained, pointing the gun at each mention of whoever's ass it was that turn. “Unlike you, I didn’t have the Avengers to back me up, so, I’m off the grid in Madripoor.”

“Hey, don’t blow that smoke. I was on the run, too.” Sam rebutted Sharon’s complaints.

“Was. Is. Big difference. I don’t speak to my family anymore - I can’t. My own father doesn’t know where I am.”

“Listen…” You began. “Sharon, we need your help, the former agent only laughing in response. “Please.”

“This isn’t over.” She conceded, shaking her head at you. “I have a place in High Town, you should be safe there for a while.”

Sharon’s place was definitely nicer than yours is now, and you’re not even on the run anymore. She, thankfully, had a change of clothes for you to slip into, the soft material much a welcome relief from the tortuous item Zemo had you wearing.

While you were waiting for Sharon’s guests to begin arriving for whatever event would soon be taking place downstairs, everybody slowly filtered out of the room until it was only Zemo and yourself remaining.

“Can I ask you a question?” You spoke up, breaking the silence from your spot on the sofa as you glanced towards the Baron seated across the room.

“Ask away.” He smiled, taking a sip from the amber liquid in his glass.

“What did you mean earlier, when you said we were the same.” Your voice was quiet now, so much so that you weren’t sure if he’d even heard you. That is until he got up from his seat and slowly walked towards you.

“I never wanted to tear the Avengers apart, not until they killed my family. Destroyed my city… Sure, I didn’t like them, but I didn’t want to destroy them. It was all about vengeance.” He began, sitting beside you on the yellow fabric. “For you, it was HYDRA who ruined your life. You joined the Avengers because it was where the last people you had left were going and it was the easiest way for you to ensure the organization was destroyed. You never wanted the idolization that came with being a hero, and it was clear when your work was done that you had no desire to keep going. Everything that came after the Sokovia Accords was out of survival.”

“I’m not saying you're right,” you began, “but what would that make me, then? Insane? Cause that seems to be the running theory.”

“You’re not crazy, despite how rumors fly. Neither am I, really.” He began, eliciting a small smile from you at the last bit he added. “You’re a fighter, someone doing whatever it takes to get their agenda done. Whether that means breaking the law or joining the Avengers, nothing will stop you once you put your mind to it - it’s one of the things I admire about you.”

You pursed your lips as you focused on the amber fluid floating in its crystalline home, him taking another sip of the burning liquid. Your gaze shifted back to his face, and oh god, look at that face. Maybe it was the liquor in your system already or maybe your last bit of sanity was finally escaping your mind, but suddenly his past didn’t seem to matter anymore. You had plenty of red on your ledger as well, and the more he spoke the more you began to sympathize with him.

“So you admire me?” You smirked, crossing your arms as you tilted your head slightly to the right playfully.

“Why don’t you look into my mind and tell me?” He replied. Reaching out, you gently placed your fingers against his temple as you gazed into his consciousness. Flashes of magic and madness, ideas of a love that could be forever or go down in flames. You didn’t go searching deeper, because your own mind was racing. Would pursuing this be worth all the pain that could very well follow? No, not could, would. You’d be betraying your former teammates, but what did that matter much anymore.

Rather than pulling your hand away, you placed your lips gently on his, tentatively, even. He tasted of expensive liquor and a hint of peppermint, and you found yourself intoxicated. The kiss ended far too soon for your liking, him pulling away so his brown orbs could gaze into your own.

“So… What do you say?” He asked, cupping your cheek in his hand, you place your own over top of his.

“Why not?” You smiled back, reconnecting your lips to his.

“I can make the bad guys good for a weekend.”

Taglist:

@fanfictionedagain @lam-ila @b0nnyzz @haydieenzzibug @cyanide-mustard @duchess-of-new-shire @the-chocoholic-writer @milenadixon @real-fbi @golddenlioness

[kimbapisnotsushi]

okay i love volume 3 just for the mimarashi reunion and igarashi fucking with him and mima getting revenge by calling him by his first name out of the blue and doing an absolutely STUNNING job with the movie ad and bringing the most pure joy i have ever seen on a character to igarashi but like. oh my god. VOLUME 4 HELLO HAVE MY FAVE MOMENTS

(this does contain spoilers so feel free to skip!!)

shun's super cute egg shirt . . . i don't even like eggs and i want one so bad omg

hayate's lil "one of us" look is SO CUTE oh my god

the guys playing merry-go-round with the drinks and shun trying them and the ppl watching thinking it causes world peace just bc shun, souma, and hayate all believe in healthy masculinity

shun going "man movie theater seats make you feel like reaching for a seatbelt" and souma going "haha yeah i know" WHILE ACTUALLY DOING IT AND THEN HIS EXPRESSION AND THE WAY THE OTHER TWO JUST LOOK AT HIM AFTER

also can i take the chance to say that like. idk what is is with kokone nata but the way she uses effects and screentones is one of my FAVORITE things . . . like the "booms" and the sparkles and just like. i don't know what makes it different but i love it SO MUCH

shun just being naturally casually touchy is SO important to me. like. we know he's bad with words/verbally expressing himself and gets really embarrassed about it but he slings an arm around souma like it's second nature and it doesn't even faze him??? futami "physical touch is my love language" shun i love you

when shun overhears igarashi and souma and goes "what're you guys talking about, bathroom stuff?" and igarashi goes "yeah!" and then souma goes "NO??" like PLEASE why would igarashi do him like that i KNEW he was a little shit

both igarashi and asami encouraging that spark in souma to grow and create and to wield his weapon and being someone he can be proud of

igarashi texting mima "i stole all your cute friends ^-^" and mima texting back "give them back" like HELLO is that not flirting??

"MIMA BEHIND YOU" and then "NO IN THE VIDEO GAME!!"

"incredible! he's missing every single shot" god that was SO funny why is his coworker so mean

mima asking souta if he can sleep over just bc he nearly shat himself in the restroom

souta calling souma his baby bro is SO cute altho idk if that's just a yen press translation thing

"lasted for: one minute"

hayate helping shun outside of the cafe warms my heart SO MUCH

MIMA THINKING HE GAINED A NEPHEW IN SHUN I'M CRYING

"don't go anywhere with strangers" "do you think i'm five" SHUN PLEASE LET HIM BE FUSSY

hayate thinking "another thing in common with mima-san!" AND HIM BEING ALL WIDE-EYED AND SPARKLY ABOUT IT MY HEART

souma using sakura as his reference for the first tag design . . . and also using shun's absolutely ridiculously stupid adorable dog for the second one

hayate calling shun to tell him he's running late and going "yeah i lost my phone" and shun going " . . . how are you calling me right now"

KOUSUKE?? AN OLDER BROTHER?? SHUN HAS AN OLDER BROTHER?? HELLO?? LET HIM JOIN THE FOUND FAMILY KOKONE NATA I AM BEGGING

DOES SHUN READ FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST PLEASE THAT'S SO FUNNY

instead of actually doing the work shun would rather call up the actual author of the book he is supposed to read i love him

igarashi with a terrible sense of direction confirmed

"do you actually have a job" SHUN. SHUN YOU CALLED THIS MAN TO HELP YOU. WHAT ARE YOU DOING WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS.

god. shun is the ultimate teenager. kokone nata absolutely NAILED it. he hates being emotionally vulnerable. he makes the most unnecessary the most wild comments designed to stab you in the heart. he thinks all the adults are cool and have cool adult powers. but he's actually incredibly so kind and considerate and UGH i love shun

asami envisioning a future in which souma, hayate, mima, and igarashi are there to celebrate shun's birthday with them makes my heart so FULL

THOSE THREE PANELS OF HAYATE BEING THE MOST SOCIALLY AWKWARD I HAVE EVER SEEN I AM LOSING IT

shun calling an indirect kiss between two guys boring and igarashi going "oh so YOU want an indirect kiss with a girl??" and shun calling him stupid

igarashi is the older bro who mocks you and teases you and is absolutely petty to all hell and hayate is the older bro who gives you the last slice of pizza even if he's hungry and it has all his favorite toppings

"hayate . . . look this way" i'm. why did kokone nata write him like that genuinely WHAT i have so many questions

i think it's funny that momosaki got excited with souta about mima possibly going to the summer festival with a girl when in the last volume she wanted him to stay single and everyone's mima

EVERYONE'S FACES WHEN MIMA SMACKED IGARASHI THINKING IT WAS A MOSQUITO

igarashi and mima taking turns to pay for "the kids" you honestly cannot tell me they aren't a married domestic couple with three children

hayate you beautiful beautiful absolute disaster

no bc. kokone nata REALLY set up the funniest dynamic where hayate has a crush on BOTH people who are also like. latently pining for each other and it's so hilarious to watch play out

"i'm here because i was spurred on by one man" oh my GOD just ask for his hand in marriage already igarashi PLEASE

shun just straight up wearing his swim trunks from the beginning of the beach trip and bringing absolutely nothing else i love him so much

the word chain game is really interesting bc i'd love to know how it went in japanese honestly

HAYATE SAYING SOMETHING NOBODY HAS EVER HEARD BEFORE AND EVERYONE GOING "what the fuck is that"

SHUN WITH THE FULL CAP AND GOGGLES I'M YELLING

"i'm able to take action because someone else already has" souma just fucking. PERFECTLY summed up how people work

WHEN SOUMA IS ASKING SOUTA WHAT WAS MADE BY PEOPLE AND SOUTA HAVING TO LIE TO HIM THAT ICHIGO-CHAN AND RAMUNE-KUN FROM BEAR CUB LAND ARE IN FACT ALIVE AND NOT AT ALL FAKE

dude if we don't get an onizero appearance or onizero themed merch i will RIOT

mimarashi versus hayate and shun in volleyball is so cute and so funny especially when shun just straight up fucking tells them they suck

SOUMA LOSING CONFIDENCE AND THINKING HE'S TERRIBLE HURTS SO BADLY OH MY GOD

LOSING ALL OF MY SHIT AT THE PAGE WHERE SHUN TRIPS OVER HIM AND DOES A ROLL TO LAND ON HIS FEET

sorry i just. wait. i just. i need a minute. [deep breath]

SHUN YELLING AT SOUMA TO "GET UP" BOTH METAPHORICALLY AND LITERALLY AGAINST WHAT IS THE PRETTIEST BEACH BACKGROUND I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE OOOOOOOH MYYYYYY GOOOOD KOKONE NATA YOU HAVE DONE IT AGAIN

[heyhihellowhatsup0]

Hooked On Your Feelings - Chapter Two (FWB! Tom Holland x Reader)

SERIES MASTERLIST

Warnings: Some angst, language, eventual smut in future chapters, fluff

Word Count: 5255

Summary: After a bad breakup, making an agreement with your womanizing neighbor, Tom to be friends with added benefits and no strings attached seemed like the perfect idea. Until things become messy, emotions caused your agreement to crumble.

A/N:  I am HYPE to post this new chapter! Omg I just love writing this series so much its so fun writing Tom like this lol. Also low key...this chapter has an easter egg to a pervious series of mine and I’m v curious if anyone catches it but probably not because its superrr tiny but either way I hope you guys like this one! Obviously, smut is in this chapter! DM me to be tagged and I cannot wait to hear everyone’s thoughts! (Also .gif is not mine. DM me for credit please, I found on google!) Thank you xx -N

“What happened to that girl you took home the other night from The Lace Rabbit?” Harrison asked as he ordered his lunch before he took a seat at the table with Tom. It was typical for them to meet up during the week on their lunch breaks and catch up when they were not busy being wingmen for the other while bar hopping on the weekends. 

Tom shrugged off Harrison’s question as he took a bite of his sandwich, “She got a little clingy so I had Y/N help me get rid of her,” he smiled as he said your name out loud. His friends knew of you as the hot girl who lived next door who bailed him out of sticky situations. Always teasing Tom how he could never actually get you. The irony made it all too funny for him, “How’d it go with that blonde girl?” he asked to change the subject off of him.

He didn’t know if he should bring up the two of you sleeping together with Harrison. Harrison was his best friend and wouldn’t judge but he knew he’d give Tom shit for it. He’d want to know details of your arrangement or how it came about, if you were really that good and Tom didn’t feel comfortable answering that. Not if it was about you. He didn’t want his other friends knowing about you in the way he did. That was personal between you both and he wanted to show you he respected you.

“It didn’t,” Harrison admitted while taking a sip of his water. He let out a chuckle as he felt himself blushing, “Forgot her name and she spilt her drink on me. Can’t say I didn’t deserve that one,” he at least knew when he was in the wrong.

Tom cringed into his sandwich as he let out a cackle, “You definitely deserved it, mate,” he laughed with another bite. His phone vibrated in his pocket but he chose to ignore it, knowing like clock work what it probably was. It was going to ruin the rest of his day and he at least wanted to enjoy lunch with his friend before getting pissed off for the day.

“She’d probably love you,” Harrison teased. 

“Fuck off,” Tom rolled his eyes with a laugh. “I’m not taking your angry seconds.”

“Don’t knock angry sex til you try it,” Harrison smirked knowingly. 

Tom shook his head as he once again ignored the phone ringing, “I think I’m good, thanks,” he brushed it off with another eyeroll. 

He didn’t know why he suddenly felt weird talking about their last venture out at the club. Maybe it was because Tom knew where he ended up after that girl had left and he knew what that meant for the both of you. But Tom wasn’t done with his bachelor days, and even you knew that. Hell, you practically insisted since this was a no strings attached deal.

It just felt strange not telling Harrison about you. Like it was a weird secret. But at the same time, he felt oddly protective of you. Not wanting his friends to see you as some girl he was getting laid with. Or worse, a potential love interest. He knew it wasn’t going to happen. Hell would be freezing over before Tom decided on any sort of long term obligation. But he knew his friends and he knew they wouldn’t see this is a simple agreement between two friends. And he didn’t want to deal with that conversation.

Staying quiet was the better option. For his own sanity. And...well, would you care if he told anyone about this? Tom figured that was another rule he’d have to ask about. He didn’t want to overstep any boundaries and he knew you had a list of rules as well that he was happy to follow. As long as that meant one thing and one thing only: non-exclusive.

Harrison noticed Tom’s phone buzzing for the third time. And Tom ignored it for the third time. He checked the message with a huff of his breath before turning the screen face down on the table, going back to his lunch before he had to get back to work.

“Clingy girl?” Harrison nodded towards Tom’s phone. 

Tom shook his head, “My mother was supposed to visit this weekend but you know the routine,” he mumbled into his food, not even wanting to respond to her.

“Let me guess,” Harrison began, knowing exactly where this was going since he knew Tom’s whole story inside and out. Including the bits he hated to discuss which was mainly his family, “Going skiing with Clint in Veil instead?” he questioned knowingly.

Tom scoffed out a laugh at his guess, “Surfing with Clint in Malibu but same shit,” he corrected as he tried not to let it get to him. But even Harrison could tell he was getting bothered by it once again and who could honestly blame him.

 Always the same story every time no matter what and Tom grew tired of her antics. He couldn’t even blame Clint for it anymore considering she’d been this way since he was a kid before he was even in the picture. Only now she would just use him as the perfect excuse to get out of coming to visit.

He knew he shouldn’t care anymore but he couldn’t help it. It wasn’t something easy for him to simply let go of. It was his mother. And no matter how many times he’d try she would always give him back the bare minimum and it always made him upset. She was his one final connection to him and she could care less about any of it, so why did Tom? It always got under his skin and he loathed that it did.

But he would still invite her. No matter how miserable it made him.

“Well at least now you’re free this weekend,” Harrison broke his thought while he gathered their garbage before they headed back to work, “The usual at The Lace Rabbit this Saturday then?” he suggested with a knowing smile to try and get Tom out of his mood.

Grabbing his phone, Tom clutched it tightly as he inhaled sharply. Knowing his change of plans meant doing his normal routine even though he was looking forward to the slight change this weekend, which now just seemed bleak to him

.

“Yeah,” Tom agreed as he tapped your name on his phone but hesitated when he saw his mother trying to call for a fourth time, “The usual this weekend.”

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Your chest tensed as you got into your car after your extremely long day in the office. Everything around you felt heavy and you couldn’t wait to get home as soon as you could but you found yourself still frozen in your car. Unable to move as the moments from earlier this afternoon invaded your thoughts once again while you tried your best to move in. Even though you knew you were completely grief stricken and didn’t know what the hell to do.

The promotion was yours, at least you had thought it was by the way your boss would constantly hint at it. You knew it was never a definite thing, but you were confident in the hard work you had put into your job and knew you were a top contender for the spot. You worked longer hours, took on extra tasks, you even worked on the occasional weekend to get your work done. Taking every precaution necessary to prove that you were the best fit for the role.

Everything felt like it was lining up for you. Co-workers were giving you a pat on the back for your work accomplishments, your boss was taking note of everything you were doing, and you overall felt really good about where you stood for the potential position. So imagine your surprise when you attended the big luncheon and your boss announced his undeserving son was getting the spot instead of you.

It was both nepotism and misogyny rolled into one and it made your stomach turn the longer you had thought about it. None of it made any sense and it was far from fair. You knew you were the one more deserving of the position, the whole office knew it. Even your damn boss knew but he chose his damn son over you and it felt like a stab right to your gut.

You felt so betrayed and beside yourself as you finally decided to head home. Tears streamed down your cheeks while you tried to focus on the road but you just couldn’t ignore the facts. How were you going to be able to show up and take orders now from your boss’ son? You knew the job more than he did and it felt like a huge screw you.

On your drive home, you tried to make yourself feel better by putting on some music to distract yourself but nothing helped. You felt beyond defeated and frustrated right now you didn’t know what was going to make you feel better at the moment. It felt like the world was against you. Between finding Justin with another woman and your job, you were really batting one thousand lately and you weren’t sure when you would catch a break.

Things were not going how you planned at all. The thought of just quitting your job and starting all over again crossed your mind but the fear of the unknown kept haunting you. You didn’t know which direction to go in or who to turn to for advice anymore. You were slowly drowning and you needed someone to throw you a goddamn life jacket already.

You were relieved to finally be home. Maybe some peace and quiet would make you feel a little better, you thought to yourself while you kicked your shoes off and turned some music on for yourself. Trying to put the day behind you and focus on the present moment while you got changed into more comfortable clothes to unwind.

You jumped out of your skin when you heard a knock at your door, not expecting anybody to come by right now. Pulling your hair up into a bun, you headed back towards the door and looked through the peephole. To your surprise, you weren’t really surprised at all. You were actually sort of relieved when you opened the door and saw Tom standing there holding a pizza box.

“That better have extra cheese,” you asked with a narrowed expression while you invited him inside with the pizza that he would always bring you even in normal times. 

Placing the box on the kitchen table, Tom opened it with a grin as he showed you the pizza pie with cheese practically oozing from the crusts, “Figured it was an extra toppings sort of day,” he admitted, knowing he really needed the escape from reality. Even if it was just a pizza.

“Tell me about it,” you sighed as you grabbed a piece closest to you as Tom handed you a paper plate. You headed over towards your refrigerator to grab you both a few beers while Tom leaned up against your kitchen counter as he devoured his slice, “I’m guessing you had a bad day judging by your pizza presentation?” knowing there wasn’t really any particular reason he’d be coming over with it today. Unless if he wanted something?

You slowed your pace back from the fridge wondering if he was going to pick up on how you were feeling. You weren’t entirely sure if you wanted him to notice. Whenever you and Tom had a pizza night it was merely to gossip about your lunatic neighbors or watch a game together. You talked about casual things but never really gone into depth or prying into each other’s lives. Why did it feel like suddenly you wanted something different? Would sex change that much in your friendship?

“We can just ignore that...we don’t have to talk about unimportant stuff,” you waved it off. Tom didn’t need to hear about your miserable day. And you didn’t want to pry into his. 

He swallowed the last bite of his slice, “If something makes you upset, it’s not unimportant,” he noted. But when he noticed you just looking at him, he raised his hands in surrender. “Ignore my philosophical ass. But I’d like to hear about your day, you know,” he laughed it off. 

What the hell was he doing? He thought to himself. Don’t let personal shit ruin this. Enjoy her company. That’s it. 

“I didn’t get the promotion,” you told him. You had mentioned to Tom a while ago that your boss was hinting at it but you never went into detail with him about it. You weren’t used to Tom actually wanting to be open or the other way around. And you’d be lying if you said you weren’t slightly surprised Tom even gave a crap about stuff like this. 

Tom frowned at your answer and he felt his heart sink a bit when you told him the truth about your bad day. He didn’t know much about your job but he was sure you were a hard worker. He saw how much you loved your job and how passionate you were about it when it would come up. You would share upcoming projects with him from time to time and he would see the look on your face whenever you explained them to him. So hearing that you were passed by for a promotion was upsetting to him.

“I...shit, Y/N,” he put his pizza down as he walked over towards to give you a hug. Sliding his hands around your waist he pulled you into him as he felt you relax against his chest, “You didn’t deserve that,” he added softly.

You allowed Tom to embrace you, his warmness comforting you a bit before you pulled away and started crying when telling him about your boss’ son getting the job instead of you. Making you laugh by calling him every name in the book, you and Tom finally found a common ground as you kept venting to him.

Tom pulled away slowly, his hand resting at your chin while he licked his lips, “You’re boss sounds like a fucking prick, I hope you know that,” he told you reassuringly. The small smile you formed when he spoke made him want to keep making you feel better, “I’m glad you’re smiling,” he blushed at his confession.

Stretching your mouth wider, you flashed Tom a playful yet overly wide grin to deflect the attention he gave to you. The two of you laughed as Tom pulled away with a loud chuckle, shaking his head at your sudden silliness, “That has to be the most hideous smile. But we’ll work on it,” he told you through his laughter.

You rolled your eyes before going back to your pizza, giving Tom a look as you nudged him, “Not gonna tell me about what happened to you?” you finally asked.

Tom tensed as he tried to brush it off with a simple shrug into his pizza. The thought of his mother’s texts and ridiculous apologies and excuses continued to drive him crazy as he mumbled into his bite, “It’s stupid shit,” he told you as he swallowed the crust he was chewing, “Mom stuff, not important,” he added bluntly.

You could see the look on his face and could tell it was important to him but you didn’t want to force him to talk about it. Tom was never one to bring up his family ever to you and that was the first time you had ever heard him even mention his mother. He never spoke of his father, at least to you, so you just assumed both were out of his life for whatever reason and it was none of your business to ask.

 And Tom refused to admit it but he wanted you to ask about him. Spending hours upon hours at bars, turning his focus always onto the girl; because he knew no girl would ever want to go home with a self righteous, egotistical guy. It was never something Tom minded to do, especially with complete strangers who he would never open up to in a million years. It might have been the recent development he had with you but there was something refreshing he felt around you and as much as it freaked him out, he didn’t seem to mind.

But diving into his mommy issues with you now seemed too much to deal with right now. You were dealing with more than enough problems with your job and your miserable ex-boyfriend, he figured you didn’t need to hear his bitching right now anyway. He came here to get away from those shitty thoughts, not open those wounds further. 

Tom came here for a distraction.

Licking his lips, Tom perked up as he looked at you fervidly, “Wanna have sex?” he asked matter of factly. He figured he didn’t need to beat around the bush since you had your arrangement but maybe he was a bit too direct with his request. Tom cleared his throat as he tried to save the night, “I-I mean, I just figured since we both had shitty days that maybe we could uhm-”

“Thought you’d never ask,” you cut him off with a smirk and you perked up as well, nodding as you smoothed out your hair. Standing back up as you turned your back towards him, removing your shirt in the process, “Let’s go,” you called over your shoulder as you headed towards your room.

“Oh, we’re jumping right in,” Tom mumbled to himself as he practically fell off his chair to follow you into your room, tossing his shirt beside yours as he practically froze already seeing you completely undressed, “Christ…” he breathed out while taking you in. 

You rolled your eyes as you walked over to him, bringing your lips to his now bare shoulder, “You’re really acting like you haven’t seen me like this the other day?” You laughed against his skin while you began to suck a bruise against him, hearing him let out a gasp while your hand snaked into his pants sneakily, “Beginning to really like this whole friends with benefits thing we have,” you laughed as you found Tom’s lips.

Practically growling into your kiss, Tom lifted you up and lowered you onto your back on your bed. His lips traveled from yours, to your stomach, dipping his tongue into your belly button as you moaned quietly before he brought himself down between your thighs. His lips peppering your inner thigh before he got straight to the point because this whole arrangement meant no foreplay. Another plus for Tom.

“Darling, I think you may be the best friend I’ve ever had,” Tom breathed out a laugh as he pressed his tongue flatly against your clit. Sliding two of his fingers into your core while he slowly pumped in and out of you, “This is what got me through my day today,” he told you before he brought his mouth back to your core.

You arched your back while your fingers went towards Tom’s curls. His name began to fall from your lips while he lapped his tongue carefully, letting it slip inside of you as he continued to tease you with his mouth. His fingers sliding into you again, adding a third as he moaned against your center; allowing the vibrations to roll throughout your entire body.

“Mmm, oh, fuck...!” you cried out, yanking gently against Tom’s hair as you felt the coil beginning to burn from inside of you. Biting your lip to stifle another moan, “Fuck...yo-you’re really good at that,” you breathed out with a small laugh which turned into a whimper.

With his head peering up at you, Tom flashed you a cocky smile with a playful wink as he licked your folds teasingly, “Did you seriously doubt my abilities to make you cum with my mouth, Y/N?” he raised his eyebrow while pumping his fingers now tantalizingly slow, “You’re gonna pay for that comment,” he said to you.

“Just...shut up and make me cum, Tom,” you told him through another gasp as you felt his teeth drag teasingly against your already throbbing bud. His lips wrapped around it as he sucked more harshly, doing exactly as you had asked him to do, “Ungh...oh god, okay. Yeah, keep doing that,” you instructed as you began to grind your hips against his mouth.

Tom took it as a challenge and picked up his pace, beginning to flick your clit faster while he continuously sucked on it. His three fingers now entirely coated in your warmth as he felt you clenching around them. His pants feeling tighter from his hard on while he knelt at the end of your bed trying to bring you to where he wanted.

His free hand splayed against your stomach, holding you in place while he felt you trying to squirm around from the way he was making you feel. Rubbing your clit in between his breaths, Tom looked up at you as he licked a solid stripe down your center, “Let out how you’re feeling from today and cum for me, Y/N,” Tom commanded. 

Your eyes shut as you did exactly what Tom had suggested. Completely coming undone from beneath him while you released as much of the tension from earlier as you possibly could but in the most amazing way. Your eyes rolled back into your head while your back arched as Tom’s tongue continued to work you up while you were at your highest point.

Letting out a breathy laugh as you started to come down from it, feeling Tom begin to kiss his way back up your stomach with a smug look, “Don’t give me that look,” you rolled your eyes at his cockiness as his tongue traced along your neck, “I could do what you just did to myself, you know,” you tried to knock him off his high horse a bit while he pretended to be wounded from your words.

“Ah, but you didn’t. Did you?” Tom reminded you as his lips found yours. His hands still in between your thighs as he brought them between you both, showing you his coated fingers while he tasted you off of them, “Tastes like I made you cum because you wanted me to,” his smugness only elevated as he pushed himself off of you as he laid on his back on your bed.

“Need I remind you that you came to my place like a porno with a pizza looking to get laid,” you retaliated as you shifted so you were now hovering over him. Your hands guiding towards his belt buckle to get him out of his restraintive pants. The pleading look on his face made you just as smug, “Sounds like you want me to do just about the same thing, am I right or am I right?” you sang in his ear.

Tom helped you get the rest of his pants and boxers off, feeling himself spring out as he stared back at you with uncertainty, ��Did you...just call me a porn star?” he questioned as the two of you let out a laugh.

“You wish, Tommy,” you teased as you ran your tongue down his abs, placing small and open kisses against his stomach as you made your way down to his legs while your hand carefully gripped his hardened length, your thumb running the pre-cum around his tip while you already heard him gasping for you.

Gripping your bedsheets with one hand, Tom reached around to create a makeshift ponytail to hold your hair. Cussing under his breath as he watched your mouth wrap around his tip, swirling your tongue around it while your eyes searched for his. He was really trying to hold it together but you were already driving him crazy.

“Let’s see what you got, Y/N,” Tom challenged you with a heavy breath as he tightened his grip around your hair, “Sometimes, girls think they know exactly what to do but-OH FUCK!” 

His words were lost as soon as your mouth went straight down to his base. Suctioning as hard as you could before coming back up his cock painfully slow. Moaning your name as his chest began to heave, Tom felt his thighs start to quiver from under you. Even just watching the way you were working on him was enough to make him whimper right now.

“Fuck...okay, yeah I take that back,” Tom gasped as his nose crinkled up while his other hand white knuckled the sheets, “God, your mouth is fucking perfect. Why haven’t we done any of this shit before?” he was in such a fucked out haze, he wasn’t even sure if anything he was saying made any sense at all. But he felt his stress from earlier going away finally. Even if this was just a short state of bliss, he was grateful for it anyway.

“You really want me to answer that or would you just prefer me to keep sucking your dick?” you sassed while you kitten licked his tip. You watched from the end of the bed as Tom bucked his hips into your mouth to try and get more contact from your lips but you pulled away from him and just kept licking his tip.

God, you were good, Tom thought to himself.

‘K-keep going,” Tom finally breathed out, flinging his head against the pillow to brace for the impact.

Hollowing your cheeks, you pushed yourself all the way down his cock. Your tongue flicking the base in between as you began to feel him throb inside of your mouth. You could tell he was close so you moaned softly into his cock, watching as Tom shuddered from the sensation you just sent through him.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Tom cried out, moaning your name as he rutted his hips into your mouth. His pupils blacked as he felt the heat rising in his body, “Shit...I’m gonna cum, Y/N,” he warned as you pulled away, running your hand down his shaft as he began to come undone for you.

His warmth spilled out into your hand and down his cock while he let go finally. The stress somewhat leaving his body as it did yours while the euphoric high peaked for him. Your lips crashed against his while his tongue parted your lips to find yours, tangling them together as he moaned against your mouth while riding out his high finally.

You waited for Tom to catch his breath before you smiled against his lips, placing a small peck against them as you pulled away with an even bigger grin, “Yeah, you’re welcome,” you gave him the same arrogant tone he gave to you moments earlier before you pecked his lips again.

After taking some time to get yourselves together mixed with the continuous fooling around underneath the sheets, you and Tom finally decided to get up and end the night. Even though he didn’t want to leave, he knew he probably shouldn’t overstay. Primarily, Tom was adamant about never spending the night at a girl’s place that he slept with. That made things complicated and he didn’t want complicated. But since you and him had rules to not make things messy, he wasn’t sure if that applied to you. For now, he wanted to play it safe so he got himself dressed again.

You pulled on an oversized t-shirt, realizing both of your hair looked a mess. Luckily you were already home and Tom was down the hall so it didn’t really matter. You wanted to say something to Tom, that you were thankful he came by tonight. You were thankful even before sex was on the table. It felt nice to have him as an ally to swing by with a pizza when he didn’t even know you needed that.

“...is it weird to say I’m glad you came by?” you gestured towards your bedroom while you walked with him out into the kitchen where the half eaten pizza was left, “I know we haven’t really made too many rules about it but…” you trailed off with a nervous laugh as you smiled at him awkwardly.

“Like we said, zero weirdness,” Tom reminded you as he padded his way over to you. He grabbed a leftover crust from the box and shoved it in his mouth, clearly starving already from the workout you had just given him. He smiled while he chewed lazily, his mouth still filled with pizza crumbs, “But I’m happy to come by when we have shit days...and make you cum as well,” he smirked deviously. 

The door opened as you smiled back, “Doesn’t have to be just bad days, you know. We could...screw whenever we feel like it,” you told him, hoping that it wasn’t too much.

“Did you just say screw?” he whipped his head towards you with a loud laugh.

“Alright then, I guess I’ll just leave you to the girls who leave you unsatisfied then,” you fought back.

Tom leaned against the door with his mouth gaped open, “They do not...leave me...unsatisfied?” he questioned himself, knowing that that was true, whether he wanted to admit it or not.

“Then why are you here?” you placed a hand on your hip, feeling the smile pulling at your lips while you messed around with him. You certainly weren’t in this mood earlier before Tom came around.

Pressing his lips together, Tom rolled his eye at you, “Fine...we can screw...whenever,” he leaned in closer to you with his eyes big as he mimicked your voice when you said it, “As long as we keep this thing strictly what we intended, you can use me whenever you need, Y/N,” and he meant it.

You didn’t back away when he sealed his words with a soft kiss, paired with his trademark grin. Tom pulled away slowly, taking in the moment as he wished you a goodnight quietly before kissing you against the cheek, “Like I said, best friend I ever had,” he said softly once again.

“Am I interrupting something?” A voice broke from behind the two of you. Both of your eyes widened towards each other as you both simultaneously pivoted your heads towards the staircase where the voice was coming from.

Tom closed his eyes with a groan, pinching the bridge of his nose as he tried to ignore Harrison staring at the two of you with a crooked grin. Making it known to Tom that explaining this was going to be a lot tougher than he had imagined.

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[eponymous-rose]

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E123 (Feb. 2, 2021)

After last week’s thoroughly relaxing and brief episode, tonight’s guests are Sam Riegel and Liam O’Brien!

Brian, to Sam: “You look like Tim Curry moved to Nantucket to become a sommelier.”

How did Caleb and Veth approach the ally-ship with the Tombtakers? Sam: “I mean, we got some information, and I think we got a little closer to Lucien and knowing whether he has any of Mollymauk inside of him, which is I think the most important knowledge that we’re seeking right now. Is there someone to be saved inside there? We got glimpses, and we got a little hint that Mollymauk is maybe still in there? Maybe? And we got a little more insight into their plans, so that was useful.” Liam: “We know why we were having that fucking dream.” Sam: “But other than that, it was just a road trip with assholes.” Liam: “All our plans have been ripped in a new direction, and it’s just been improvisation.” Sam notes that it feels like we’re always about to rip into Caleb’s backstory, but haven’t yet followed that thread all the way through. Liam: “It’s partially frustrating, to be sure, but also I like the idea that-- his whole shit has been selfish, it’s been dealing with the trauma that he’s been through and not the greater world, and that’s been shifting somewhat.”

Does Caleb think the book was worth it, and is he still interested in reading more? Sam: “How do you ask Caleb not to read a book?” Liam: “Caleb has spent enough time with the Nein to know you shouldn’t put a hand on a hot stove. After what happened with the book, he knows it’s a terrible idea. But maybe. But it’s a really bad idea. But reserve judgment, but it’s a really terrible idea. I think that Caleb is very aware that mages and people like him very easily fall prey to their curiosity and it can lead to bad places. But there is still that amount of scientific endeavor where you think there is value in knowing and learning, and maybe we can ride that line. He was True Neutral at the start of the campaign, and maybe he’s Chaotic Good now, but part of him is hubris, even if it’s a little bit, still.”

What about Otis has drawn Veth’s focus? Sam: “I mean, he’s a little shit. She was curious about Otis because he’s a small like she is, and in talking to him, he seemed to be real creepy, but he was just creepy and distant and didn’t value his past or family or anything like that. She sees someone who’s like her, but so not like her, and maybe that scares her a little bit more.”

How does Caleb feel about Beau being on this ride with him? Liam: “The dream is another example of how Caleb had very narrow vision of the things he wanted to do. It used to seem so massive to him, but now... To have Beauregard involved feels right. If anyone in the group is going to stop him from grabbing something he shouldn’t, it is probably Beauregard. She’ll punch him in the fucking face to stop him, which I think he needs, to a certain extent. They’re two different kinds of nerds, and I kind of like that, that this group of nine philosophers, they’ve reached out and somehow grabbed the two nerds in the party.”

How do Caleb and Veth see the Somnovum? Sam: “I mean, they seem real bad. Anything that’s a quorum of powerful entities heading towards your planet to unleash an energy of any kind, typically bad? I assume they’re bad, or at least the Tombtakers wish them to do ill.” Liam: “I think they want the kind of peace that comes from snapping your fingers and turning people to dust. Caleb sees them as a cautionary tale; they’re the worst-case scenario for arcane inquisitiveness.” He sees Allura Vysoren as the antidote to that.

Why the staunch refusal to use Halfling Luck? Sam: “I don’t like Luck! I just don’t like Luck. I think it’s cheap, I think it’s a cheat, I think it’s stupid. It just feels like a do-over.” Liam: “I am your antithesis! If I ever voice a halfling, I am going to hammer that feature!” Sam: “What I love about D&D is that you don’t know what’s going to happen. If you roll bad, okay, that’s it. If you roll well, it makes the success more enjoyable to know that it’s a pure success and don’t one where you’re like well actually... it’s so stupid. If someone was about to die, I would probably use the fuckin’ Luck feature. Well. It depends who. If it was Travis, yeah, no, he’s fucked, sorry.”

Liam drops that he’s picked Sam’s character class and race again for a hypothetical campaign three. Sam: “It’s not what I was thinking for future characters, but I’m excited to explore.”

Cosplay of the Week: an amazing Mollymauk by KatofValkyrie!

What was it like to bring the Tombtakers into the tower? Liam: “It is complicated, because he does not like him. Lucien’s just a fucking dick. But Caleb also knows that Molly’s in there somewhere. That tower’s only for the M9, and Lucien’s not in the M9. Their situation with these people is shitty, it’s terrible. Caleb doesn’t feel like they have the upper hand. He doesn’t like that they’re even going on this journey per se, because life is bigger than his bullshit. He feels like they’ve been losing over and over again, so it was a gamble to try to get on equal footing.

What spurred Veth into making sure she and Yasha have some one-on-one time? Sam: “Yasha hasn’t been getting a lot of moments to shine. Now that she’s back, I just got the impression that Yasha feels out of place sometimes, or timid, or unsure of herself. When Veth was Nott, Nott certainly had her share of those moments. I think she sees a kindred spirit and wants to make sure that she’s been giving all the opportunity she can to flourish and thrive. Dani, you’re just laughing at my mustache, aren’t you?” Dani: “Yes, that’s the only thing I’m laughing at through this whole bullshit.” Sam denies all knowledge of trolling, but eventually admits, on the topic of Yasha and Beau getting together: “They’ve made me wait this long... I’m going to make them wait a little bit longer!”

What was it like to show his friends the upper floors? Liam: “I kinda expected somebody to sneak up there before that. That being part of the tower is not even a conscious choice of his, it just is. The reason Caduceus has creeped Caleb out for a long time is because he talks about how-- Caduceus is a really kind person and wants Caleb to let go of the past. And in a really simplistic way, turn that frown upside-down. And that’s just not who Caleb is, and it’s not who everybody is. There is something to be said for trying to stay open and positivity, but thinking you can shut out the past, especially a traumatic one, is just not true. When things happen to us, we carry them. But to candy-coat it and say, ah, I’m free, or everything is good, or I’ve turned the corner... life is way messier than that. It’s not flipping a switch, it’s not bad-to-good, it is such a work in progress. Even when you make strides and start to get to a better place, you can backslide a lot. So the tower is who he is, and the tower is 7/9ths love for his friends, and 1/9th hope, but there’s still a percentage of him that carries everything from the past, and knows that he should, and knows that he should not go back to where he was. And the way to do that is not to say everything is rainbows, but to remember it. The tower is just like an extension of who he is. He’s never going to forget the past, and he’s never going to be like, I’m good, or I’ve turned a corner. He should remember the past, and he should do better, always.”

Does Veth still believe it’s possible to get Molly back? Sam: “Well, she was a person trapped in another body for many years, so has some experience there, and definitely believes that the spirit and soul of Molly is in there and just needs to be unlocked somehow.”

Fan Art of the Week: an amazing group shot by HarpySN!

How are Caleb and Veth dealing with their guilt and fear about being in the middle of this? Sam: “It definitely was a deep conversation that might have repercussions going forward. The problem with all of what we’re doing now is that we don’t have time to deal with our petty problems anymore. It’s all high tension all the time!” Liam: “It’s true; they’re not in control of their situation at all anymore.” Sam: “It’s good to have these check-ins, but it’s not like we can do anything about them. We’re reactive right now.” Liam: “He’s not happy with where they are, but they wouldn’t even be this far if the goblin hadn’t pulled him out of the mud. So part of it is, you saved me from where I was and got me on my feet again, and now it’s disconcerting to see it all just get knocked sideways by something he never could’ve predicted. I think Caleb felt nostalgic for when things were simpler, in a way, for them, when we’re both troubled drifters.”

What was it like to see Gelidon’s return? Liam: “I am the least superstitious person at the table. Ashley’s dice suck.” Sam: “It was fun fighting a dragon!” Liam: “Two massive battles in one episode, neither of which came away with a victory. I guess surviving is a victory.” Sam: “I’d forgotten about the dragon, honestly.” Liam: “I loved it. I was so upset at the idea that we were going to stealth and not get into it.”Sam: “Mercer doesn’t keep a live dragon around and not do something with it. That dragon’s coming back.”

How do Caleb and Veth feel about going to see Essek? Sam: “He can be very helpful, I believe, but as Sam Riegel, a player of D&D, I’m super suspicious. What the fuck is Essek doing up there, so close, now? I don’t trust him as far as I can throw him. And I can throw him pretty far because he floats.” Liam: “I 100% agree with you. I do not understand what Essek could bring to what we are going through. I know the audience loves him, I love him too. He’s a really cool character. But he’s fucking toxic. He out of curiosity caused a war between two nations. And Caleb has been changed for the good by the M9 from months of travel with them. Essek has had none of that. Caleb has changed for the good, but not because of people like Essek. Essek is where Caleb came from. We kept the lid on the pot during the whole treaty at sea and it almost all went fucking sideways, and only because we pressed him into a corner. I hope that guy finds some sort of balance and peace for himself, but I do not see how his input here would be helpful. There’s other heavy hitters that I would try to pull in.”

Liam notes that the Cloven Crystal is in the Bag of Holding. Sam: “Do I have Fluffernutter, or is Fluffernutter gone?” Liam: “Nope. 300 pounds of fireworks? Gone. A dead mage, a threshold crest, and fireworks.” Dani: “Your basic essentials.”

[alltheworldsinmyhead]

ON FEYSAND’S PLOTLINE IN ACOSF

              !!!!MAJOR SPOILERS FOR THE WHOLE ACOSF!!!!

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Let’s be honest for a while, okay?

ACOCF had potential to be SJM’s best book, if not for any other reason then because of the sheer idea of it. Coming-of-age, healing story of the most complex and polarizing character she has ever created set in the time of peace, away from the familiar setting (according to the later changed concept which still remains in the snippet at the end of ACOFAS), development of her arguably most feisty and angsty love story... It could be her absolute trumph. Even with the change to stick to Velaris instead of exploring the Illyrian culture of the Mountains and with the added conflict of the Mortal Queens and Koshei, it still could work quite well. 

It didn’t. For many, many reasons, but the most important one, in my opinion, being the feysand pregnancy plot. 

Nothing about this plotline made sense. Not a single thing. From start to finish, it was an absolute disaster from the character-writing POV, from the narration POV, from every single context of it. It broke the rules of real-life logic, it broke the rules of this fantasy world setting and it completely exposed that Rhysand, while not a bad guy, is a pretty terrible partner, even worse ruler and an absolutely terrible contender for the High King title. 

Let’s break this whole mess down (and expect this post to be mammoth-sized. it’s not my fault, though, write to SJM if you have any complains):

1) Feyre, 21, decides to get pregnant, even though less than a year earlier, she expresses the delight with not being forced to bear children to her new mate and told him herself she wants to wait a while and enjoy her life with him. Feyre decides she wants a baby though and Rhysand goes along with it, even though he is aware how young Feyre is and how hard her life has been up until this point. He wants a baby too much to have an honest discussion with Feyre about it, to stop and wonder what is the reason for her sudden change of heart, to reassure her that they have a lot of time ahead of them and don’t need to rush. No. She mades a sudden decision to have a baby after A YEAR OF MARRIAGE and not much more of being turned fae, JUST AFTER having her whole world put upside down, having received a completely new title and responsibilities, surviving the wat and being mated. Great. 

2) Feyre decides to get pregnant and Rhys goes along with it less than a year after the end of the bloody war. It is politically a delicate time, everyone is still not sure how the balance will shift, some countries don;t want to sign the peace treaty, etc. There are a lot of enemies and a lot of turmoil remaining. But sure. Let’s have a baby. Perfect time to add yet another target, another weakness that can be use by the Mortal Queens, Beron or whatever else with malicious intent towards the Night Court. 

2) Feyre gets pregnant after approximately a year of trying. I know healthy people of reproductive age for whom it takes ages more than this. Fae’s pregnancies are rare af and precious and happen once in a blue moon, but ofc SJM broke the world’s rules for her darling Feyre. And again, for Kallas and Vivianne who are also expecting the baby, even though it has been a maximum of 3 years since they’ve mated. 3 years is also not a particularly long time to try to have a baby for those who have issues with their reproductive systems like Fae women. Thank you, next. 

3) Rhys has unprotected sex with Feyre in her Illyrian form when she conceives, even though he knows full well having a winged baby would kill her. He does it anyway, for shits and giggles apparently. They probably have sex in the sky above Velaris, for all we know. 

4) The baby has wings. Now, the whole explanation with Illyrian wings being bony (bc they resemble bat wings) and Seraphin ones being more flexible (bc they resemble bird ones) is so insanely stupid that it takes around 3 seconds to wikipedia this shit and find out it’s exactly the opposite. But okay, the baby has wings and Feyre will die while giving birth, along with the baby. Madja forbids Feyre from turning into an Illyrian to carry the pregnancy because it MIGHT hurt the baby. Now, remember, Feyre conceived while in Illyrian form and then turned into High Fae. The baby survived it just fine. The baby MIGHT be hurt by Feyre turning .... but it will FOR SURE die if she stays High Fae and Feyre will too. Idk about you, but I would take the risk of MIGHT instead of FOR SURE. Especially when she is already in labour and dying. Cauldron or Nesta or idk who alters Feyre’s pelvis after the baby is cut out of her for no apparent reason but to allow feysand to make exactly the same mistakes later on. How convinient. And Nesta also alters her own pelvis bc god forbid she won’t be able give Cassian babies like the little useful mate she is now. She should’ve probably done it with Elain too, just in case she decides to fuck Az in the future, because fuck consequences and fuck the stakes in the story that make the readers actually CARE about characters bc they know the author may actually kill them and not save their life every fucking time.  

5) I don’t even want to comment on the fact Rhys hid the true danger of this pregnancy for Feyre and their family went along with it. It is absolutely disgusting. And Nesta telling her and that being condemned as the act of the ultimate cruelty which is a final straw to break her self-loathing back.... is abhorrent. It made my sick, actually, phisically sick. There is no justification for it. No at all. And the fact that they did not even consider abortion sends a message that I really don’t want to think too much about it. Feyre was 2 months along when they learned the baby is winged. 2 months. 8 weeks. It wasn’t a baby yet, let’s be honest. They could’ve at least discussed it. She - oh my god, I cannot believe SJM wrote it this way, I’m gonna be sick. 

6) For the entirety of Feyre’s pregnancy, they have no plan to really help her. Labour plan? Haven’t heard if it.  They have money and power and access to the healers of the whole land. And did not figure out how to stop her from bleeding out after a fucking C-section. THIS WORLD HAS MAGIC AND THEY COULDN’T STOP HER FROM BLEEDING OUT AFTER A FUCKING C-SECTION. Didn’t even ask Thesan, the High Lord of Healing, to be present. Cassian had guts hanging out of his stomach and survived. Az was fucking slashed apart in Hybern and survived. But yeah, Feyre was on a brink of death after a C-section. Great, Sarah. Keep it up. Let’s force the thought into young girls’ heads that labour is the most lethal thing ever, why not. 

7) Also, for the entirety of Feyre’s pregnancy, Rhys keeps quiet about this idiotic bargain. He, as far as we know, doesn’t make any plans for the moment when him and Feyre and possibly their baby are dead. If they died and baby survived.. who would take care of it? Does Rhys have a conversation with his family about it? NAH. Doesn’t write any sort of plan how to keep the Court going, doesn’t inform even the closest of his co-workers how they should proceed to act after he’s gone and his and Feyre’s power go to god-knows-who. Their deaths would mean a sure chaos for the weakend and fragile Prythian and the Night Court especially and yet nor Rhys nor Feyre make any sort of preparations for it. Rhys doesn’t tell his brothers or Mor or HIS SECOND IN COMMAND they will all soon have to somehow manage without him. He was about to just leave them to their own devices and told them in the last. possible. moment. 

And this man - this man is, according to Amren, the best candidate to handle the whole country? To unite it? This fool who makes idiotic bargains, who thinks first about his cock and his own selfish desires and considers his subjects and his responsibilities as a High Lord last and least important of all? Who has so much trust in his wife, in his High Lady, the mother of his son that he doesn’t tell her she will almost surely die on a birthing bed because it MAY UPSET HER? 

This plotline was the straw that broke my back. ACOTAR, at it’s heart has always been a ya fantasy with added ‘spice’ and I was willing to bend my critical-thinking skills in many cases and forget and forgive many smaller idiotic issues in this series. But this? It is not idiotic. It is massive and stupid to the point when it becomes insulting to the reader. It was a plot straight out of a bad fanfic, not something that should be in a published book written by someone who writes for a living. You could even argue that Twilight has handled this toxic trope better.  I have wasted my money on this book and thinking about it will always be painful for me. So yeah.

ACOSF could be great. Ended up quite pathetic. 

[castiellesbian]

i feel like i need a glossary of terms or a contact list for all these people involved with the show. i have shit memory and dont pay attention to the credits who is sera (sara??) and why does everyone hate her!! why is he Bobo!!!!!! please... has anyone posted about this im desperate

lol well including everyone involved with the show would be difficult, but I’ll give you some highlights

Eric Kripke: creator of Supernatural, showrunner for seasons 1-5. People have differing opinions about him but general people enjoyed his run and he’s considered the best showrunner in the series overall. Not much to say because there’s a lot to say lmao (notable episodes: “Pilot,” “Lazarus Rising,” and “Swan Song”)

Sera Gamble: writer who was involved from the beginning of the show, became showrunner after Kripke left. Her seasons, 6 and 7, are typically regarded as the weakest seasons. She was a huge brothers-only supporter, and was responsible for Misha being written out of the show (as well as Jim Beaver, Bobby) in order to get the show to just be about the brothers again. There’s a lot of drama regarding her treatment of Misha/Cas, but more recently she’s known for the Magicians debacle, a horrendous example of the Bury Your Gays trope. She’s also involved with (the showrunner of?) You on Netflix. She was a pretty good writer, but overall fans dislike her because of her showrunning tenure (notable episodes: “Faith” with Raelle Tucker, “Death’s Door,” “The Born-Again Identity”)

Jeremy Carver: writer from season 3 that was promoted to showrunner from seasons 8 through.... some time in 12, the timeline has been a little murky to me. He was the one who brought Cas back into the main plot, as well as allowing the deancas storyline to become genuine subtext (we can argue whether it was queerbaiting or what he was intending to do if he had been running the series finale, but yeah). Unfortunately, he was also the showrunner when Charlie was killed off brutally, which dampens his legacy. People are conflicted about his seasons, but generally he’s looked upon favorably (not related, but the picture that comes up when you search him on google is NOT him, he’s really like a typical white nerdy looking dude lol) (notable episodes: “The Rapture,” “Sacrifice,” “Do You Believe in Miracles?”)

Andrew Dabb: writer from season 4, promoted to showrunner during season 12 and is the last showrunner of Supernatural (he wrote the finale). He was well-liked by deancas fans for awhile because of how much screentime they were allowed to give, and because of the focus on extended/found family. Sam and Dean only fans didn’t like him for the same reasons. Unfortunately, HIS legacy has been marred by the awful series finale, though it’s debated whether that was his fault or because of network meddling. (notable episodes: “Dark Side of the Moon” with Daniel Loflin, “The Prisoner,” “Moriah”)

Robert Singer: executive producer since the beginning of the show (he’s also co-showrunner throughout Supernatural, but I don’t think he typically was involved with the plotlines too often). He’s directed quite a few episodes, including the infamous wire fight episode (s13 finale) as well as the series finale. Married to Eugenie Ross-Leming, writer of the show

Eugenie Ross-Leming/Brad Buckner: writing partners TECHNICALLY from season 1, but they only wrote one episode until they were brought back in season 7. They are regarded as the worst writers in all of Supernatural, responsible for tactless death scenes of fan-favorites (and typically minorities) like Kevin, Charlie, and Eileen. They also feature a gross amount of dubcon/noncon, racism, weird unnecessary sex stuff, and are SUPER into Lucifer for some unknown reason (they have a crush on Mark Pellegrino I guess). They’re also just kind of bad writers in general, their pacing is weird and their plots convoluted. To be fair, though, they have written some good moments, like Dean trying to reach Cas in Hell’s Angel and Dean’s confessional scene in Paint It Black. But overall, they suck. Why are they still on the show even though BOTH sides of the fandom (who never agree on ANYTHING) dislike them? Well, because Eugenie is married to Singer. Nepotism. (notable episodes, the ones I can stand to watch lmao: “Holy Terror,” “Hell’s Angel,” “Our Father Who Aren’t in Heaven”)

Ben Edlund: writer from season 2 who left after season 8, but people STILL talk about him simply because he is arguably the strongest writer of the series. Cas fans particularly like him because he did most of the heavy-lifting regarding Cas’ characterization. He also wrote the famous bi!Dean scene with Aaron in season 8, where Dean is flustered after being flirted with. (notable episodes: “On the Head of a Pin,” “The French Mistake,” and my all-time favorite “The Man Who Would Be King”)

Robert “Bobo” Berens: writer from season 9, his first episode was “Heaven Can’t Wait,” which is all you really need to know about his influence on the deancas storyline. He’s also gay, so people particularly enjoy seeing how he approaches destiel in his episodes since it’s not just another straight guy potentially just catering to fans. He was also the one who was meant to go off and run Wayward Sisters, and is responsible for a lot of their development in recent seasons. I believe he also created Rowena? He wrote the episode this season where Cas confesses his love to Dean (along with other heavy deancas episodes like “The Trap”). Sam fans typically don’t like him because he doesn’t give him much focus. (notable episodes: “Heaven Can’t Wait,” “Who We Are,” “Wayward Sisters” with Andrew Dabb)

Steve Yockey: writer from season 12 through the beginning of season 15. Also gay, and also responsible for deancas moments in recent years. Generally loved for his deancas subtext but ALSO because he is an amazing writer who came out with iconic episodes. (notable episodes: “Celebrating the Life of Asa Fox,” “Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets,” “Peace of Mind” with Meghan Fitzmartin)

Robbie Thompson: writer from seasons 7 through 11, and wrote some fan favorite episodes in the meantime. He is also the creator of fan favorite characters like Charlie and Eileen. He was also one of the few writers who was vocally supportive of destiel during his tenure rather than just later. I’m not implying anything about his intentions, but it was validating for him to encourage fans during a time where most of the cast/crew ignored or actively dismissed it. Plus his episodes are just fun! (notable episodes: “LARP and the Real Girl,” “Fan Fiction,” “Baby”)

Meredith Glynn: writer since season 12, has worked closely with Bobo during their seasons together. She and Bobo cowrote “The Future,” which is the mixtape episode, so she has been taken in by deancas fans haha. She also wrote the episode where Cas makes the deal with the Empty, so it’s pretty safe to say she and Bobo had worked on the deancas plotline together :) She’s also liked some deancas-related tweets on twitter, so she’s being subtly supportive (notable episodes: “Regarding Dean,” “The Future” with Robert Berens, “Byzantium”)

Davy Perez: writer since season 12 (a lot of the ones I’ve mentioned are, since this is when Dabb became showrunner and made changes in the writers room). His episodes tend to either be horror or bizarre. I mention him because he’s responsible for episodes like “Stuck in the Middle (With You)” (Cas’ first “I love you”) and “Tombstone” (aka Brokebacknatural lmao). I don’t know much about him otherwise, but that’s why he’s brought up usually (notable episodes: “Stuck in the Middle (With You),” “Tombstone,” “Atomic Monsters”)

hopefully this helps, and hopefully I didn’t forget about anyone major. There have been a LOT of people behind the scenes so it’s hard to say who to include. Like, I didn’t mention Jerry Wanek, Jim Michaels, Kim Manners, Thomas J. Wright, or others who might be mentioned from time to time.